I Realize, and I Can See

I see the Not Normal.

Every day I wake up and I say to myself, this is not normal. It is not a "new normal," it's simply Not Normal.

The things that are not normal are the fascist government overreach currently being enacted by the present United States government, not just here but all over the world.

"They," whoever "they" are, think Mr. Obama's overreach was bad, but the overreach of today's government is not simply corrosive and treacherous, it is sinful and evil.

One may think there is not much difference in that, but there is.

The difference is one of intent.

The things that I see others do not see, and they see things I do not see, apparently. I blink rapidly when I see people still cheering for the United States, for example. We're at our core a pretty rotten country now, one that is absconding with women's rights with every stroke of a presidential pen, one that has, for years now, imprisoned more of its population than any other nation in the world. We're number one for making sure new parents have no time off to care for their newborns - get your ass back to work, new moms and dads. New kid? Tough shit. We require 0 weeks of paid leave, though you can take 12 weeks off without pay if you can afford it and be assured you will still have a job. Thankfully some companies are a bit more generous than the government, but how long will we be able to count on that?

I also realize that we're number one in making money. In spite of the third-world looks that are rampant in many areas of the nation now, what with potholes in every road and infrastructure failing and a lot of folks not eating well, we still have the world's largest economy. So we're number one in business environment. Yay, wage slaves! Go us.

We are not, however, the world's happiest people. That title belongs to New Zealand, followed by 16 other countries. We're 17th on the happiness scale.

We rank 32nd in health - yeah, that is not number 1 - and we rank 52nd in safety and security. Also, not number 1. We do rank #1 in gun ownership. That's really keeping us safe, isn't it? Because we're hoarding them against the government, as if the most mighty military on earth won't simply knock in your door or blow up your house, if it comes to it, and your little AR-15 isn't going to do a damn thing except maybe come in useful when you want to shoot your own head off. Bang bang, you're dead.

Let's not forget that our life expectancy is less than other countries. Got your coffin purchased yet? Or maybe you prefer cremation. I suggest putting all of that in order, the sooner the better.

The thing is, this could be a very long list, this list of things that we no longer excel at. I see, with wide open eyes, a failing country, one that has stagnated and plummeted in the last 15 years. I expect the drop began much sooner - probably around 1980 - but like so many young folks I was busy trying to earn money and I was sick a lot and trying to have children, the things that people in their 20s and 30s do.

By the time I started paying attention - really paying attention - it was too late and a pall fell over me when I realized that everything I was taught in public schools (except basic stuff, like how to add and subtract and put words together), was pretty much propaganda put in place to keep working stiffs hoping that someday they'd work just hard enough to get ahead.

You never get ahead. You might think you do but you really don't.  But keep dreamin' that American Dream. It's easy not to understand what you don't want to see.

Today I hear that our president has cut off subsidies for the Affordable Care Act. Those subsidies allowed poorer folk to have health insurance. I also hear that his health department is defining life as beginning at conception. And they took away the health care of millions of kids a few weeks ago when they let CHIP (Child Health Investment Partnership or Comprehensive Health Investment Partnership, depending on locality) fail for lack of funding.

Because there is nothing like making a country great again by forcing women to have children they don't want and then not helping them care for the life you have forced them to bring into the world. Hurrah for evangelical theological fascist politics. Go to church on Sunday and slit your throat (metaphorically - and maybe literally) on Monday.

I realize that I am powerless to make great changes in the world. Nothing I write here is going to make any difference. Nothing I say to my so-called leaders matters. Their agenda is not my agenda.

I see this.

I know other people see it, too, because they write about it. People have been writing about it for a very long time, and still no one listens. They listen instead to sound bytes and they read 140 character tweets but I honestly wonder how much people think about, well, anything anymore. Nobody sees beyond tomorrow's results. But the things they do today have results that go far beyond tomorrow. One must think long term. There are trees, and there is a forest. And beyond that hills and meadows, mountains, and streams.

There is no one size fits all. Policy set in stone is dictatorial and authoritarian, and it reeks of a kind of patriarchal assholiness that only a certain subset of humanity seems supremely capable of.

Somehow, that subset seems to be the one with the power and the money.

I realize this, and I can see it.

I also see there is very little, if anything, that I can do about it, not as one. I used to believe in the notion that we were a great nation and a great society. I thought I was one of many, not singular and insular. That the greater good mattered. Apparently no one thinks that anymore, that the sum of the parts creates a greater whole. All that matters is me, me, me.

Now all I see is a decaying land and a lost and failing nation, ruled and scourged by lesser men than those who came before.

Nothing to do but watch the fallout, now, and cross the street when the light changes.