The tops of trees

I just happened to glance out my window Sunday morning in time to see the sun do a dance on the tops of the oak trees and the hillside beyond.

I slipped outside and was startled when a doe snorted at me. She ran and another doe, previously unseen, came from the side of the house and nearly ran over me. I was too surprised to take a picture.

My days anymore seem crammed with work, with effort, and with lots of thought. Sometimes I have so much to do that I am frozen by the knowledge of it all. I am writing five articles (or more) a week, with all that entails, keeping a clean house (having a home office is not a harbinger of good housekeeping, regardless of what certain in-laws might think), trying to stay healthy (very difficult for me), keeping my tax information current, working on a new filing system, holiday shopping, writing a novel, and building a website.

The website has become the biggest burden hanging over my head, with the filing system a close second.

I chose back in October to attempt to build a website and decided to use a specific web-site building program recommended to me by a friend. It cost $300, and I couldn't find any way to build a website and *not* spend $300, so I decided to use this option.

This is a special type of marketing/website building program, and it is set up so that it (a) holds your hand and (b) forces you to do it *exactly* as instructed, without deviation. It comes with more manuals than I ever dreamed possible - I have printed out over 300 pages of information, and have at least triple that saved in .pdf files, with more still out there. So much information that it is nearly paralyzing, actually.

But I have discovered a lot of things while attempting to do this:

• I am not a linear type of gal. If there is a path, I prefer to walk . . . way over there, off the path . . . and see the moss and the leaves.
• I prefer clean, straight directions without distractions. I don't like being constantly persuaded and "sold", especially after I've already made up my mind, and this website does a *lot* of persuading and selling.
• I do better if I can play around with a program and figure it out myself, or have someone demonstrate it and explain it. Video programs and manuals that seem to never get to the point don't do it for me.
• I don't have a lot of patience for programs that don't work without bugs. Some of the software used at this website crashes or hangs up on me so frequently that I have grown to despise it. I can only hope the actual website building software, which I haven't even begun to investigate yet, doesn't do the same.
• If I can find something more onerous than writing a novel, which this has turned out to be, then I will work on my novel instead of the more onerous task. (That alone has been worth the price of the website).

My life is a little confused right now. My directions are many, but all my options are open. Life is open, the doors are open. That can be bewildering. But is also exceedingly exhilarating, and I am not complaining. I am rejoicing in the challenges, and looking forward to seeing what the upcoming year brings.