Thursday Thirteen

Thursday 13: Holidays I’d Declare If Anyone Put Me in Charge

1. National Frog‑Catching Day. For people who enjoy nature but not enough to actually keep the frog. Nor do they want to eat the frog's legs. Just catch and release. For the fun of it.

2. National Throw a Hissy‑Fit Day. One sanctioned meltdown per person. No rollover credits. Hissy-Fit may involve verbal frustrations but no physical abuse, please, although jumping up and down in utter exasperation is completely allowed.

3. National No‑Cussing Day. A challenge for some, a vacation for others. Give the four-letter words a break and see if you can recall those usages from childhood, like "Son of a Sea Biscuit" or "Oh fudge!"

4. National Eat Chocolate All Day Day. Self-explanatory and what's not to like? Doctors may file objections; they will be ignored.

5. National Don’t Call Me Unless You’re on Fire Day. A holiday with clear boundaries. Informally called "Leave Me Alone Day." Same sentiment, just less forceful.

6. National Pants Quality Control Day. Manufacturers must explain themselves and tell us why pants legs are not always the same length, ladies pants come without pockets, and why inseams never actually are what the measurements say they are.

7. National Stop Using My Email for Your Spam Accounts Day. Justice at last. Maybe the folks who use my email for their spam would get theirs?

8. National Root Beer Appreciation Day. A&W gets a parade. Stewart's root beer comes in second. Mug root beer brings up the rear. Maybe it doesn't even get in the parade.

9. National Leave Me Alone, I’m Reading Day. Mandatory quiet hours. Violators face stern looks. Everyone turns into a librarian going "shhhh" while reading a book. Imagine the absolute quiet. 

10. National No Bossy Robot Voices Day. Pharmacies must use humans or silence. They absolutely would not tell me to move picking up a prescription to the top of my "to do" list. Additionally, all customer service calls would be answered by real people for once without going through a menu of 17 different items.

11. National Drought‑Be‑Gone Day. Rain encouraged to behave and come again, like every day for at least a week or more.

12. National Rainbow Spotting Day. Morning or evening, whichever your house allows. Nothing like brilliant colors in the sky to remind one that the heart is full and overflowing even on rainy days.

13. National Mind Your Own Business Day. A holiday with immediate national benefit. No one would be on social media. Opinions would be quashed, voices silenced. Congress might actually pass a bill.

What holiday would you invent?

_________________

Thursday Thirteen is played by lots of people; there is a list here if you want to read other Thursday Thirteens and/or play along. I've been playing for a while, and this is my 972nd time to do a list of 13 on a Thursday. Or so sayth the Blogger counter, anyway.