Thursday Thirteen #755

Alexa tells me today is "limerick" day. So without further ado -

(I didn't write these.)

1. Limericks I cannot compose,

With noxious smells in my nose.

But this one was easy,

I only felt queasy,

Because I was sniffing my toes.

2. There was a young woman named Bright,

Whose speed was much faster than light.

She set out one day,

In a relative way,

And returned on the previous night.

3. There was an odd fellow named Gus,

When traveling he made such a fuss.

He was banned from the train,

Not allowed on a plane,

And now travels only by bus.

4. There once was a fly on the wall,

I wonder, why didn’t it fall?

Because its feet stuck? Or was it just luck?

Or does gravity miss things so small?

5. There once was a man from Tibet,

Who couldn’t find a cigarette

So he smoked all his socks,

and got chicken-pox,

and had to go to the vet.

6. There was a young woman named Bright,

Whose speed was much faster than light.

She set out one day,

In a relative way,

And returned on the previous night.

7. I need a front door for my hall,

The replacement I bought was too tall.

So I hacked it and chopped it,

And carefully lopped it,

And now the dumb thing is too small.

8. There once was a boy named Dan,

who wanted to fry in a pan.

He tried and he tried,

and eventually died,

that weird little boy named Dan.

9. A newspaperman named Fling,

Could make “copy” from any old thing.

But the copy he wrote,

Of a five-dollar note,

Was so good he now wears so much bling.

10. I know an old owl named Boo,

Every night he yelled Hoo,

Once a kid walked by,

And started to cry,

And yelled I don’t have a clue!

11. I once fell in love with a blonde,

But found that she wasn’t so fond.

Of my pet turtle named Odle,

whom I’d taught how to Yodel,

So she dumped him outside in the pond.

12. I’d rather have Fingers than Toes,

I’d rather have Ears than a Nose.

And as for my Hair,

I’m glad it’s all there,

I’ll be awfully sad, when it goes.

13. There was a Young Lady whose chin

Resembled the point of a pin:

So she had it made sharp,

And purchased a harp,

And played several tunes with her chin. (Edward Lear)

These came from this page. Visit it to read more limericks!

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Thursday Thirteen is played by lots of people; there is a list here if you want to read other Thursday Thirteens and/or play along. I've been playing for a while, and this is my 755th time to do a list of 13 on a Thursday. Or so sayth the Blogger counter, anyway.