Dealing With Death

I found out Saturday that my Aunt Dot passed away on August 1.

Obviously, we were not close. Aunt Dot was the ex-wife of my mother's brother, Butch. They divorced when I was a child and I have no idea what happened to Aunt Dot in the interim.

 Butch perished in a fire at his home in February 2019.

Over the course of learning of my uncle's passing and the subsequent family interventions that required, Aunt Dot got in touch with family members, including me and my brother, via Facebook.

Until then, I'd heard nothing out of her for decades. I barely remember her.

When we became reacquainted on Facebook, we did not interact much. She remembered me as a child. I was quite young when I last remember seeing her. 

She told me in a message that she wanted to write a book, that she was glad I'd become a writer. 

I didn't offer to help her write a book. She had hinted at that in one of her messages to me. I told her I'd be glad to take a look at something she finished, but I wasn't going to write something for her. (I get asked to do that a lot - it generally goes like this: "My life is so interesting and really is a story that needs to be told, won't you write it for me and if it makes money you can have half." The latter is either stated or implied. I always say no. It's a rule I made years ago.)

She messaged me a few times and commented on a couple of my posts, particularly anything pertaining to my mother, whom she remembered fondly. I always responded and I was polite.

I had wished her happy birthday on June 24.

She had cancer - which I didn't know but apparently my brother did - and she died not long thereafter.

I don't know how I feel about this. She was not someone I knew. I mean, I knew her when I was a child, but as an adult, I did not know her except from our Facebook interactions. I had, in fact, unfollowed her because she was posting political and religious items that I simply did not care to deal with. 

Maybe I feel a little confused because I unfollowed her. I didn't "unfriend" her. I just didn't want to be preached at. I don't go to FB for that.

From the comments on her timeline, she was well-loved by her friends. I'm glad to know that.

All I remember of Dot is that she was always nice to me and I had no reason to be unkind or cause disagreement with her. So I didn't.

And now I find she has passed away.

People pass through our lives, come and go, and are in and out. She was there near the beginning of my life, and I was vaguely there at the end of hers. Isn't it odd?