Thursday Thirteen

The other day on Facebook someone posted a list of 12 things not to say or do to introverts. Oh,I thought, I could add one more and have a Thursday Thirteen.

Of course I did not take care of it then and when I went back I couldn't remember who had posted it and I could not find it.

But I liked the idea so now I am going to talk about introverts anyway, even if it may not be 13 ways to take care of your introvert.

1. A lot of people are introverts, but no one knows how many. Some people say 1/4 of the population, others say just under half. I found a quote that says introverts are "a minority in the regular population but a majority in the gifted population." I like that one.

2. So what is an introvert, anyway? It is not, as you might think, shyness or depression. They are not socially inept. Instead it is a personality trait. The introvert generally does not find other people energizing; they find being away from people energizing. They work well on solo projects, in other words. They like to think about things before they speak. They are idea people.

3. Introverts generally do not talk a lot, nor or they in the public eye. You won't find many introverts in politics, for example. Extroverts think by talking, introverts think before talking.

4. Words that describe introverts include reflective, independent, level-headed, refined, sensitive, contemplative, etc. They are the daydreamers, the readers, the writers, the artists of the world. They are also inventors, engineers, and others upon whom the feet of society tend to walk. People might want to look down every now and then.

5. Studies using brain images indicate that the brain activity of introverts take place in the frontal lobes. These areas are activated with solitary activities and at that time, introverts find their energy and expend it in solving problems, introspection, and complex thinking.

Extroverts think with the back of their brain. These areas process information from the external world, so they need stimulus from outside of themselves. They seek out other people and thrive on these interactions.

6. If you really want to make an introvert happy, try not to talk so much. Skip the small chats and go straight to something serious and amazing. Introverts don't care much what happens in Hollywood, but ask them what they think about Pluto no longer being a planet, or their thoughts on some major hot button issue, and you'll have an interesting conversation. Though you might find it a little heated at time, so be careful. Introverts like deep conversation.

7. Keep it short. While you might be able to carry on for hours at a party or an event, such things wear on introverts. They grow weary and need their alone time to recharge. I myself have been known to seek personal space in bathrooms or by taking a quick walk outside when I'm at crowded events.

8. Don't constantly ask your introverted friend if everything is okay. Being quiet doesn't mean something is wrong. Just give them space. They'll be okay.

9. Let your introvert stay in what you perceive as her shell. It's not really a shell, it's where she is in her comfort zone, and most likely she's happy there. If she asks you for help of course that's another matter entirely.

10. Help your introvert find her focus. Sometimes introverts have so many thoughts running around in their heads, they can't keep them straight. You can best do that by listening when she does talk, instead of talking over her. Don't tell her what you think she should do, listen to what she is saying and help her figure it out herself. She'll be much happier that way.

11. Myers-Briggs test indicate what kind of personality you have. You can take a free test here and see what it says about you.

12. As for me, I tend to score 100 percent on the "introverted" part of these tests. Depending on the test, I am either an INTP or an INTJ - with the latter coming up as I've aged. This was predicated when I first took the Myers-Briggs in the 1980s and it has come true. But I score so evenly in the latter number that I am not sure it matters where I am concerned.

13. As an INTJ (my score on the test this morning), I am a MASTERMIND. "Masterminds are rare, comprising no more than one to two percent of the population, and they are rarely encountered outside their office, factory, school, or laboratory. Although they are highly capable leaders, Masterminds are not at all eager to take command, preferring to stay in the background until others demonstrate their inability to lead.... their aim is always maximum efficiency.

Yes, world, I am an INTROVERT. Thank you very much.


Thursday Thirteen is played by lots of people; there is a list here. I've been playing for a while and this is my 236th time to do a list of 13 on a Thursday.