Thursday Thirteen

Today, I thought I'd write about mindfulness.

This is a thing that has been around a while, and I do not take it to the extremes that some folks do. I don't sit and meditate often, (so I do not consider myself good at it) but I do find the concept of mindfulness helpful. Basically, to be mindful is to be aware of the here and now, not worrying about tomorrow or thinking about yesterday. It is being present and acknowledging whatever is going on at that time. It is not about being happy, although it can help one to be happy. 

And it can be really hard to do, especially if the present is fraught with scary and unpredictable things.

Anyway, here are a few take-aways for mindfulness that are easy.

1. Use something you do all the time to remind you to be mindful. For example, every morning when you make your bed, stop and be aware of what is going on around you. How do you feel at that moment? What do you hear or smell? How does the bedding feel under your hands? Take a few deep breaths and then go back to your chore.

2. Walking. Being mindful doesn't mean being still. Taking a walk and noticing everything about the experience can be exhilarating, even if you are in your own home. How does the floor feel on your feet? Do you feel a current of air as the heat or air conditioner turns on? If you are outside, what do you see? Do you feel the wind? Is it warm or chilly? How does your body feel as it moves?

3. Watch your words. Especially in today's world, it is helpful to think before speaking. To be mindful when you speak means to be aware of what you're saying and when and why you're saying it. As yourself if the words are appropriate. Are they hurtful? Do they need to be said? What happens if you pause to think about what you're saying? Does that break via silence create a change in the conversation?

4. Listen mindfully. To do this, one must blot out personal thoughts and key in on what the speaker is really saying. This means hearing not only words, but also watching body language. Try to listen without worrying about what your response is. If someone is talking it makes you nervous or angry, why? Explore that thought (maybe later with a journal entry if necessary.)

5. Simplicity. Do one thing at a time. I am bad at this one - I multitask a lot. Some things can be done rather mindlessly - I can empty the dishwasher while I'm on the phone with a friend. But many things require absolute attention. I read sometimes with the TV on, but I prefer to read in silence. Concentrate on one thing at a time.

6. Put technology to use. Set reminders to be mindful! Or find a good guided meditation app and use it to help destress. Listen to calming music. Pay attention to it when you're listening. Why does it calm you?

7. Breathe. This is central to meditation, but it helps to tune in to it. I have discovered (with practice) that I can make myself breathe in and out of my nostrils separately! Who knew? Time your breaths. Do different rhythms. Hold, hold, breathe. Or breathe, breathe, hold. What feels right to you? Do you feel it all the way into your belly? Can you visualize the oxygen flowing to your fingertips?

8. Use it for sleep. I do this every night. I check in with myself, using mindfulness at bedtime to fall asleep. I think about how my body feels against the bed. Then I focus on my toes and tell them to relax, and slowly move on up. All the while I am breathing as slowly as I can. 

9. Pay attention to what you eat. This has been hard during 2020! But eating mindlessly adds pounds and calories. I try not to eat in front of the computer or the TV. I do read while I eat and I need to stop this, because I am not paying attention to my food. I am reading and I look up and my plate is empty. What did I eat? I need to pay attention to each bite. How does it feel, taste, smell? What am I experiencing when I eat and pay attention?

10. Take a mindful shower. I do this frequently, feeling how the water feels on my skin, how it feels on my hair, its temperature and how hard or soft it feels against my skin. I also like to do an aura cleanse when I'm in the shower, allowing the water to clear the air around my body.

11. Take a break. Sometimes when the stress has me by the throat, I need to simply stop. Then I focus on my breathe, or watch the deer outside the window, or anything to change the thought patterns that have stressed me. It's a quick reset.

12. Be creative. Losing myself in playing the guitar, writing, coloring, gardening, or any other intense activity is a great way to be totally mindful and keep the spirit happy. If I am playing the guitar and 45 minutes have gone by without my noticing, then I have been having a great time!

13. Be mindful of others. I've already mentioned speaking and listening, but there are other ways to appreciate the humanity of those around you. Look in someone's eyes, for example. Watch the person. Wish them well in your mind. (I frequently ask my own guardian angel to go look after someone else for a while, if I know of someone in need.) Light a candle for someone and stare in the flames while thinking of the person. Remember that everyone has good times and bad. We are all human, we are all a part of this earth, we are each other's keepers. Connecting with another person, even if that person is far away and has no clue you're thinking of him or her, can be a wonderful experience.

I am no expert in mindfulness, but I use these to help me try to stay focused on the present and combat bad thoughts. Maybe some of these can help you, too.

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Thursday Thirteen is played by lots of people; there is a list here if you want to read other Thursday Thirteens and/or play along. I've been playing for a while and this is my 677th time to do a list of 13 on a Thursday. Or so sayth the Blogger counter, anyway.