My husband is a kind, loving man. He treats me well and is a gentleman.
He's also stubborn and apparently, I have to hit him upside the head with something to make him understand things sometimes.
Case in point:
Our microwave sits in a built-in cabinet space about the oven (a Jenn-Air with a downdraft). It is high for me to reach even on a good day, but I can get stuff in it. I can't reach the top of it or hit the top buttons on the microwave without a stepstool.
As I went to put a bowl of soup in the microwave at lunch, I asked my husband to come to me. "Do you just not see that when you use the microwave?" I asked him, pointing to a mess at the top of the microwave where something had exploded about 4 days ago and I'd been too sick to try to clean it up.
"Oh, there is a mess there, isn't there," he said.
"I was taught to always clean up a mess when I saw it," I remarked.
And that for him, apparently, was the end of it. He didn't take the hint that I wanted the microwave wiped out. He ate his lunch and left.
I hauled out my stepstool, heated up a cup of hot water in the microwave to loosen things up, climbed up on the stool - with a little vertigo going on from this cold, mind you - and cleaned the microwave.
What part of my showing him the mess did not indicate a desire to have it cleaned up? Do I really have to spell it out? Do I have to say, "Would you please clean the microwave?" Pointing out the mess wasn't enough of a message?
Then we have an issue with the shower drain. He has attempted to clean it, and we've bleached and used vinegar and baking soda and snaked the drain and used Drano and all sorts of stuff to get this odor to disappear.
It has not disappeared.
However, he cannot smell it. He has never been able to smell it. It's not a priority for him because he can't smell it. It about gags me to take a shower, and I'm starting to think that this may be why I'm so sick.
So today I did what he should have done. I called the shower drain manufacturer and asked if this was a known issue. Guess what? It is, especially in areas with hard water.
Guess what we have? Hard water.
The manufacturer will open up a case claim and send out a field rep. I want this taken care of. I learned a long time ago, that many times, I just have to do stuff myself.
I love my man, but sometimes I don't understand him.
Men and women never really understand one another. There's always something that bothers us women about the husband, and mostly we just keep it to ourselves and get over it. In my case, it's never a big deal. Like your husband, mine is a good man and really loves me, so it isn't worth arguing about small things.
ReplyDeleteOh, we didn't argue over it. As I said, I just did it myself. Generally, that's what happens. I needed something to write about, though, and this was on my mind. As the commenter below says, I need to be more direct and not simply offer hints.
Delete"I was taught to always clean up a mess when I saw it," I remarked.
ReplyDeleteOne thing you need to know about men is that subtlety does not work one bit. What you should have said is:
"Can you clean the microwave for me?"
Men don't get hints. I know I don't. Mrs PM has to tel me directly. I think that ladies think that men can read their minds and see a hidden message no matter how subtle the hint.
Also, men's sense of smell is not as good as that of ladies (so I've been told). Mrs PM has come home and said " I think one of the cats has done something inside the house. Can't you smell that?"
I seriously couldn't. And my sense of smell is (I thought) fine.
I hope this help.
;o)
Cheers
PM
That is right! Men don't get hints.
DeleteSometimes we just have to ask straight out for help. I once told my husband I would ask the neighbor to check the problem out and then he decided to do it himself!
ReplyDelete