Tuesday night in the dark, with fog and rain making driving difficult under any circumstance, I had a little vehicle accident. I hit a deer. Well, actually the deer sort of ran into the side of the car. It was a small animal and it mostly ran into the wheel. No damage to the vehicle and the deer, after a moment of stunned and momentary confusion, ran away. I am hoping it was only bruised.
In any event, with icy weather coming and more darkness meaning more driving in the night, I thought I'd offer up 13 safe driving tips today.
1. Pay attention. I saw the deer as it entered the fog lights on my car, as I did not have the brights on because with foggy weather brights do not work well. Had I not been watching the road, I probably would have plowed into the deer instead of the deer running into me.
2. Don't trust other drivers. Unfortunately, too many people do not pay attention. They have their cell phones on and they are talking or texting, or maybe jamming out to music. I've seen people apply lipstick and once some guy in an open-door delivery vehicle beeped his horn at me as I passed him on the interstate so I could see that he had his penis out and he was jerking himself off. Obviously he was not paying attention to the road.
3. Yield to the other drivers. Sometimes you have the right of way but I have noticed that especially at four-way stops, nobody knows who is supposed to go first. The rule is the vehicle to the right goes first.
4. Wear your seat belt. This is the law in most (if not all) states in the U.S. Restraining yourself so you don't tumble from the vehicle and be crushed by it does make sense now, doesn't it?
5. Look ahead. I try to figure out my next move with vehicles, particularly in heavy traffic, far ahead of what I need to do. For instance, if I have to get off at an exit, I find my way into the correct lane long before I need to be there. I notice if people are hitting their brakes way in front of me. I slow down if traffic looks odd. (My husband, on the other hand, apparently only sees about three feet in front of the car sometimes.)
6. Slow down. Be aware of the road and weather conditions. Fortunately, I was driving slowly the other night because of the rain and fog. I am sure that was a factor in keeping me from being hurt or having my car damaged.
7. Choose your route. I go out of my way to try not to make left turns, though of course sometimes you have to. Left turns are dangerous, but they can be avoided by taking just a moment to make a right and then a legal U-turn or whatever you must do to avoid the left turn.
8. Learn how to recover from a skid. This takes a little practice because it is counterintuitive to release the brake pedal and steer toward the skid. Being a farm girl I learned how to do this a long time ago by driving an old vehicle around in a field, but I doubt everyone has that opportunity.
9. Don't drive while you are impaired. This does not simply mean don't drink and drive. It also means if you're sick, or if have an injury, you need to realize that you may not be as quick with your reflexes as you normally might. For instance, I have a chronic issue with my right ankle. I keep that in mind when I'm driving. In fact, on days when it is really acting up and swelling, I simply don't drive.
10. Slow down at intersections. I know you've passed through the one at your house a thousand times, but you never know when someone is going to plow on through even if you have the green light and the right-of-way.
11. Maintain your vehicle. Check the tires, make sure the headlights and tail lights work, keep the brakes in working order. If you have a problem with the vehicle, have it fixed.
12. Be careful when backing up. You can't always see small things. I learned this the hard way when I backed into my husband's motorcycle. He had parked it just out of my line of sight and as I backed out of the garage, I hit the front tire, which was turned a little and in my path. As you know, with a motorcycle it doesn't take much to damage it when it hits the ground.
13. Use common sense. This is probably the hardest one, because I think common sense left the room a long time ago, but if people would only think a bit about their actions when they drive, many accidents could be avoided.
_____________
Thursday
Thirteen is played by lots of people; there is a list
here if you want to read other Thursday Thirteens and/or
play along. I've been playing for a while and this is my 423rd time to do a list
of 13 on a Thursday.
Thursday, December 03, 2015
Wednesday, December 02, 2015
Tuesday, December 01, 2015
If We Had a Real Say
Yesterday, my husband went to the county courthouse to pay our local taxes. He said he was going to tell the treasurer that our share was not to be spent on shell buildings.
Shell buildings are the big thing right now in local conversation. The county wants to build an empty building, hoping it will lure in a big corporation. The problem is, they want to build it atop one of the loveliest knolls in the county, which also happens to have historic structures located on them. The supervisors want to "relocate" the structures.
Of course, the money we paid goes into the county's general fund, and it will be spent however the supervisors determine. I will have to content myself with thinking my share is supporting the schools and the county library, and somebody else's share is supporting the things I disagree with.
I began wondering what it would be like if our representatives really voted our interests at all levels of government. Perhaps on the IRS form there should be a place where we could mark how much of our taxes we wanted to go where.
For example, I might want 30% to go to welfare programs to reduce inequality, 10% to infrastructure, 30 percent for public safety (police, fire departments, etc.), and 30 percent to public education. You, on the other hand, might want 100 percent to go to military. Whatever. Your mileage may vary. None of us would agree on the funding ratios, but I bet when the totals were in that the numbers would not be as the dollars are currently spent.
My point is, they don't ask. Locally, representatives don't ask, statewide they don't ask, and nationwide they don't ask. They take their election as some kind of mandate to do what they want and to stick to the harmful and destructive political lines that have been drawn. This occurs even though poll after poll at the national level indicates that the citizenry would rather see public funds spent in different ways than the current breakdown, but nothing is ever done about it. The people in power do what they want, and if you have an opinion, your best bet is to be sit over there and be quiet. Otherwise someone will, at the least, want to argue with you.
But if we are all quiet, then no one will be left to speak out for us when it is too late. So if you want your tax dollars spent elsewhere, locally or otherwise, say something. Write your representative. Writer a letter to the editor.
Complain about it on your blog.
We have voices. We must learn again how to use them.
Shell buildings are the big thing right now in local conversation. The county wants to build an empty building, hoping it will lure in a big corporation. The problem is, they want to build it atop one of the loveliest knolls in the county, which also happens to have historic structures located on them. The supervisors want to "relocate" the structures.
Of course, the money we paid goes into the county's general fund, and it will be spent however the supervisors determine. I will have to content myself with thinking my share is supporting the schools and the county library, and somebody else's share is supporting the things I disagree with.
I began wondering what it would be like if our representatives really voted our interests at all levels of government. Perhaps on the IRS form there should be a place where we could mark how much of our taxes we wanted to go where.
For example, I might want 30% to go to welfare programs to reduce inequality, 10% to infrastructure, 30 percent for public safety (police, fire departments, etc.), and 30 percent to public education. You, on the other hand, might want 100 percent to go to military. Whatever. Your mileage may vary. None of us would agree on the funding ratios, but I bet when the totals were in that the numbers would not be as the dollars are currently spent.
My point is, they don't ask. Locally, representatives don't ask, statewide they don't ask, and nationwide they don't ask. They take their election as some kind of mandate to do what they want and to stick to the harmful and destructive political lines that have been drawn. This occurs even though poll after poll at the national level indicates that the citizenry would rather see public funds spent in different ways than the current breakdown, but nothing is ever done about it. The people in power do what they want, and if you have an opinion, your best bet is to be sit over there and be quiet. Otherwise someone will, at the least, want to argue with you.
But if we are all quiet, then no one will be left to speak out for us when it is too late. So if you want your tax dollars spent elsewhere, locally or otherwise, say something. Write your representative. Writer a letter to the editor.
Complain about it on your blog.
We have voices. We must learn again how to use them.
Monday, November 30, 2015
The Art of Appreciation
I had a conversation recently in which a person told me s/he did not feel appreciated by family members, or anybody else, for that matter.
So I began thinking about what it means to be appreciated. Or to feel appreciated.
First, I must say I think that the two can be confused. Someone can be appreciative and the other person not realize that whatever the first person is offering is appreciation. And the second person may not realize that the first person has done something which should be appreciated or remarked upon.
I also have to wonder if people who feel unappreciated appreciate others back. It does seem to be a reciprocal kind of relationship. For example, if the husband doesn't appreciate whatever contribution his wife makes to the marriage, then it is likely she isn't going to appreciate his contributions, either. And vice versa.
My husband hears me thank him quite frequently. I thank him for working, for making money, for putting up with my crazy moods, and for handling my current illness with aplomb and grace. I am not sure I thank him enough.
Now, he seldom thanks me in words. He is not a vocal man. He is a quiet guy. But he thanks me when he stops by the grocery store when I'm not up to shopping. He thanks me by working hard to earn money to pay the bills, something especially important now that I am not able to work as I once did.
So our appreciation styles are different. Sometimes I don't recognize his actions as appreciation, and sometimes I think my words to him go in one ear and out the other. He feels more appreciated, I think, when I actually do something for him - wash his clothes, fix a nice dinner, snuggle with him on the couch. The words are nice and I mean them when I say them, but for him I think the actions matter more.
Now me, I would like to hear the words more often. I would like for him to occasionally thank me for doing the laundry or washing the dishes. I also like for him to surprise me with a small present, even a box of Tic Tacs. Otherwise I begin to feel taken for granted.
These are different languages we're speaking, but we're saying the same thing - I love and appreciate you. However, we may not be able to understand one another if we're not listening, or not trying to listen, anyway.
I am reminded of a book I have here somewhere called The Five Love Languages. I think this applies to feeling appreciated as well as feeling loved.
In the book, the five different ways of communicating are words of affirmation (my thanking my husband), acts of service (my washing the clothes), affection (hugs and kisses, snuggles on the couch), quality time (being together without the TV or anything else on), and gifts (the person remembers you and gives you something to show appreciation).
I think if your way of showing appreciation is to buy someone a gift, but the other person doesn't want a gift, they want a compliment or acknowledgement of something they did, then you have a communication problem. I can see where this could escalate into an argument very quickly. "I bought you a present and you don't like it," "Oh, I like it, but it's just a candy bar, and I did all this work and you didn't even notice," and boom. There you go. The round starts and everybody's in the ring, boxing gloves in hand.
Learning not to take it personally can be difficult. You do things day in and day out, and nobody ever says thanks for it. After a while it feels like drudgery and it is easy to become resentful. Meanwhile, the other person is doing things for you day in and day out, and you don't recognize it, and that person becomes resentful, too.
Stuff simmers. Toss in issues like financial concerns, interfering parents, children, job stress, medical issues, and any number of other things, and that resentment turns into a full-on boil, complete with steam and roiling water.
I have been married for 32 years, so I feel like I can comment on this issue with some authority. You don't stay married (and happily, at that) for such a long time without learning something.
My husband I do not necessary speak the same language of appreciation, but we have learned that appreciation comes in many forms. Just because he doesn't think to buy me a soda when he stops at the store doesn't mean he does not appreciate me. It just means he didn't think to buy me a soda. Just as if I am ill and don't do the laundry one day, it doesn't mean I don't appreciate how hard he must work to make money. It just means I was ill.
When we don't communicate, we have issues. This goes for every relationship I am in, and it goes outward in a ring that extends from my husband to family to friends to acquaintances to the media and the mixed and awful messages it offers. If you aren't listening, if you're too busy talking and thinking about what you want and not hearing the other person, then nobody is appreciating anything.
We've become a very self-centered sort of nation here in the US, where we expect to be catered to and many of us have a sense of entitlement that is out of place. I run across it all the time and it is always jarring, but too many people are entwined in their cell phones when they should be paying attention to the human being standing next to them.
Life is not a bowl of cherries, but if you have one cherry, you can appreciate that. If you're lucky enough to have the whole bowl, then you can be very appreciative. But people are not things, and showing appreciation for the one you love is not all that hard.
It just takes a little thought, and a little listening, so you can figure out what that person needs in order to feel loved.
So I began thinking about what it means to be appreciated. Or to feel appreciated.
First, I must say I think that the two can be confused. Someone can be appreciative and the other person not realize that whatever the first person is offering is appreciation. And the second person may not realize that the first person has done something which should be appreciated or remarked upon.
I also have to wonder if people who feel unappreciated appreciate others back. It does seem to be a reciprocal kind of relationship. For example, if the husband doesn't appreciate whatever contribution his wife makes to the marriage, then it is likely she isn't going to appreciate his contributions, either. And vice versa.
My husband hears me thank him quite frequently. I thank him for working, for making money, for putting up with my crazy moods, and for handling my current illness with aplomb and grace. I am not sure I thank him enough.
Now, he seldom thanks me in words. He is not a vocal man. He is a quiet guy. But he thanks me when he stops by the grocery store when I'm not up to shopping. He thanks me by working hard to earn money to pay the bills, something especially important now that I am not able to work as I once did.
So our appreciation styles are different. Sometimes I don't recognize his actions as appreciation, and sometimes I think my words to him go in one ear and out the other. He feels more appreciated, I think, when I actually do something for him - wash his clothes, fix a nice dinner, snuggle with him on the couch. The words are nice and I mean them when I say them, but for him I think the actions matter more.
Now me, I would like to hear the words more often. I would like for him to occasionally thank me for doing the laundry or washing the dishes. I also like for him to surprise me with a small present, even a box of Tic Tacs. Otherwise I begin to feel taken for granted.
These are different languages we're speaking, but we're saying the same thing - I love and appreciate you. However, we may not be able to understand one another if we're not listening, or not trying to listen, anyway.
I am reminded of a book I have here somewhere called The Five Love Languages. I think this applies to feeling appreciated as well as feeling loved.
In the book, the five different ways of communicating are words of affirmation (my thanking my husband), acts of service (my washing the clothes), affection (hugs and kisses, snuggles on the couch), quality time (being together without the TV or anything else on), and gifts (the person remembers you and gives you something to show appreciation).
I think if your way of showing appreciation is to buy someone a gift, but the other person doesn't want a gift, they want a compliment or acknowledgement of something they did, then you have a communication problem. I can see where this could escalate into an argument very quickly. "I bought you a present and you don't like it," "Oh, I like it, but it's just a candy bar, and I did all this work and you didn't even notice," and boom. There you go. The round starts and everybody's in the ring, boxing gloves in hand.
Learning not to take it personally can be difficult. You do things day in and day out, and nobody ever says thanks for it. After a while it feels like drudgery and it is easy to become resentful. Meanwhile, the other person is doing things for you day in and day out, and you don't recognize it, and that person becomes resentful, too.
Stuff simmers. Toss in issues like financial concerns, interfering parents, children, job stress, medical issues, and any number of other things, and that resentment turns into a full-on boil, complete with steam and roiling water.
I have been married for 32 years, so I feel like I can comment on this issue with some authority. You don't stay married (and happily, at that) for such a long time without learning something.
My husband I do not necessary speak the same language of appreciation, but we have learned that appreciation comes in many forms. Just because he doesn't think to buy me a soda when he stops at the store doesn't mean he does not appreciate me. It just means he didn't think to buy me a soda. Just as if I am ill and don't do the laundry one day, it doesn't mean I don't appreciate how hard he must work to make money. It just means I was ill.
When we don't communicate, we have issues. This goes for every relationship I am in, and it goes outward in a ring that extends from my husband to family to friends to acquaintances to the media and the mixed and awful messages it offers. If you aren't listening, if you're too busy talking and thinking about what you want and not hearing the other person, then nobody is appreciating anything.
We've become a very self-centered sort of nation here in the US, where we expect to be catered to and many of us have a sense of entitlement that is out of place. I run across it all the time and it is always jarring, but too many people are entwined in their cell phones when they should be paying attention to the human being standing next to them.
Life is not a bowl of cherries, but if you have one cherry, you can appreciate that. If you're lucky enough to have the whole bowl, then you can be very appreciative. But people are not things, and showing appreciation for the one you love is not all that hard.
It just takes a little thought, and a little listening, so you can figure out what that person needs in order to feel loved.
Sunday, November 29, 2015
Sunday Stealing: Consider Yourself
From Sunday Stealing
Consider Yourself Meme
1) Of the various cultures, ethnicities or nationalities you belong to, which most strongly do you consider yourself?
A. American. But if you're asking my background, it's Scottish and Irish.
2) Is there a culture you cannot claim heritage from but which you feel quite close to?
A. Nothing that is on my radar at the moment.
3) What's one language you wish you knew fluently?
A. I used to speak Spanish somewhat but never fluently. Fluently would be nice.
4) If you could move anywhere in the world and be guaranteed a job, etc., where would you go?
A. I would go to New Zealand if I could be a guide in Hobbiton.
5) If you had a time machine, and could witness any one event without altering or disturbing it, what would you want to see?
A. The trial of Joan of Arc.
6) Have problems sleeping?
A. Yes.
7) Are you free with your feelings?
A. I think not but I am likely wrong.
8) What is the one outfit/piece of clothing/accessory you own that makes you feel incredibly good whenever you wear it? Why?
A. My signet ring from Hollins University, because it reminds me of my accomplishment of my masters degree.
9) What do you do to make yourself feel better when you're in a funk?
A. Play video games, read, play the guitar, or watch Lord of the Rings.
10) Has anyone ever surprised you in a way that let you know you were special? How?
A. My husband gave me a nice surprise party for my 50th birthday.
11) When you are having a "good day," how do you spread the happiness to others?
A. I laugh with them, or make them laugh.
12) What is one thing that puts you in a bad mood, no matter how good you were previously feeling?
A. I am not going to answer this question.
13) Would you rather live in a world with or without technology such as computers, cars, airplanes, bombs?
A. I would definitely like to live in a world without guns. How about just a world without gunpowder. That would eliminate a lot of things that are deadly.
14) If you had to live without either heating in your house or air conditioning, which one would you keep?
A. I'd have to keep the heating or I would die in the winter. Virginia can get very cold.
15) If you had to own five dogs, what kind would you get?
A. I would never own five dogs. But if were going to get a dog, it would be a small poodle.
__________
I encourage you to visit other participants in Sunday Stealing posts and leave a comment. Cheers to all us thieves who love memes, however we come by them.
Consider Yourself Meme
1) Of the various cultures, ethnicities or nationalities you belong to, which most strongly do you consider yourself?
A. American. But if you're asking my background, it's Scottish and Irish.
2) Is there a culture you cannot claim heritage from but which you feel quite close to?
A. Nothing that is on my radar at the moment.
3) What's one language you wish you knew fluently?
A. I used to speak Spanish somewhat but never fluently. Fluently would be nice.
4) If you could move anywhere in the world and be guaranteed a job, etc., where would you go?
A. I would go to New Zealand if I could be a guide in Hobbiton.
5) If you had a time machine, and could witness any one event without altering or disturbing it, what would you want to see?
A. The trial of Joan of Arc.
6) Have problems sleeping?
A. Yes.
7) Are you free with your feelings?
A. I think not but I am likely wrong.
8) What is the one outfit/piece of clothing/accessory you own that makes you feel incredibly good whenever you wear it? Why?
A. My signet ring from Hollins University, because it reminds me of my accomplishment of my masters degree.
9) What do you do to make yourself feel better when you're in a funk?
A. Play video games, read, play the guitar, or watch Lord of the Rings.
10) Has anyone ever surprised you in a way that let you know you were special? How?
A. My husband gave me a nice surprise party for my 50th birthday.
11) When you are having a "good day," how do you spread the happiness to others?
A. I laugh with them, or make them laugh.
12) What is one thing that puts you in a bad mood, no matter how good you were previously feeling?
A. I am not going to answer this question.
13) Would you rather live in a world with or without technology such as computers, cars, airplanes, bombs?
A. I would definitely like to live in a world without guns. How about just a world without gunpowder. That would eliminate a lot of things that are deadly.
14) If you had to live without either heating in your house or air conditioning, which one would you keep?
A. I'd have to keep the heating or I would die in the winter. Virginia can get very cold.
15) If you had to own five dogs, what kind would you get?
A. I would never own five dogs. But if were going to get a dog, it would be a small poodle.
__________
I encourage you to visit other participants in Sunday Stealing posts and leave a comment. Cheers to all us thieves who love memes, however we come by them.
Saturday, November 28, 2015
Saturday 9: Black
Saturday 9: Black Is Black (1966)
Unfamiliar with this week's tune? Hear it here.
2) WalMart, Best Buy, Toys R Us and Target have all heavily advertised their "Black Friday" sales. If you could have a $50 gift card to one of those stores, which would choose? What would you spend the $50 on?
A. If I had to chose, I would go to Best Buy and purchase ink for the printer.
3) Star Wars items are predicted to be big sellers this Black Friday. Are you a big sci-fi fan? Are there any sci-fi fans on your holiday gift list?
A. I am a big science fiction and fantasy fan. I live and breathe the Lord of the Rings. If someone would give me a Legolas doll for Christmas I would be ecstatic. :-) I like Star Wars but am more into fantasy. My brother is also into similar movies and books. He is the only other nerd on my holiday gift list.
4) Feasting and football are also popular Thanksgiving weekend pastimes. Do your Thursday-Sunday plans include pigging out or watching a game?
A. Eating was on big on Thursday, with leftovers Friday night. But no football games for me.
5) At Thanksgiving dinners, Crazy Sam's homemade gravy is always a hit. (Probably because she's so generous with the cognac, which gives the gravy a nutty taste.) Do you have a signature dish?
A. I usually fix the turkey for Thanksgiving, which is held at my mother-in-law's house. Aside from making killer fudge, I am not known for other dishes.
6) What did you give thanks for on Thanksgiving 2015?
A. I am thankful that I have a good husband, a nice home, and good friends. And Saturday 9 and Sunday Stealing and the people who play these memes with me.
7) Monday is Cyber Monday, when shoppers can save big online. Do you shop confidently over the Internet, or do you worry about security breaches and identity theft?
A. I had my credit card numbers stolen online once, and it was scary. I worry a great deal about this and try to sidestep it by having a single credit card I use online and taking advantage of the various alerts my bank offers.
8) This week's featured band, Los Bravos, was international. Their members came from both Germany and Spain. If you could travel to any foreign country in the world, which would you choose?
A. I would love to visit Ireland/England/Scotland. I'd have to take a long trip and do all three.
9) The band's name, Los Bravos, can be translated to mean, "The Brave." Do you consider yourself gutsy?
A. Not so much anymore, but when I was younger I was rather fearless. For example, I went up in a hot air balloon. I took a ride in a twin engine plane with an old drunk guy. I went for a long ride deep into the National Forest to explore a cave full of endangered bats. I went into a burning building (it was a firefighter's training building, and firefighters were with me, but it was still on fire). All of those were to "get the story" when I was an avid and daring news reporter. I don't do things like that anymore.
_____________
I encourage you to visit other participants in Saturday 9 posts and leave a comment. Because there are no rules, it is your choice. Saturday 9 players hate rules. We love memes, however.
Unfamiliar with this week's tune? Hear it here.
1) Black is this week's signature color because Friday, November 27, was "Black Friday," when retailers cut their prices and consumers flock to the stores. Did you score any "Black Friday" bargains?
A. I did not go out, but I did a little online shopping. I did not feel like I managed bargains, though. More like I paid the price the things were actually worth to begin with.
2) WalMart, Best Buy, Toys R Us and Target have all heavily advertised their "Black Friday" sales. If you could have a $50 gift card to one of those stores, which would choose? What would you spend the $50 on?
A. If I had to chose, I would go to Best Buy and purchase ink for the printer.
3) Star Wars items are predicted to be big sellers this Black Friday. Are you a big sci-fi fan? Are there any sci-fi fans on your holiday gift list?
A. I am a big science fiction and fantasy fan. I live and breathe the Lord of the Rings. If someone would give me a Legolas doll for Christmas I would be ecstatic. :-) I like Star Wars but am more into fantasy. My brother is also into similar movies and books. He is the only other nerd on my holiday gift list.
4) Feasting and football are also popular Thanksgiving weekend pastimes. Do your Thursday-Sunday plans include pigging out or watching a game?
A. Eating was on big on Thursday, with leftovers Friday night. But no football games for me.
5) At Thanksgiving dinners, Crazy Sam's homemade gravy is always a hit. (Probably because she's so generous with the cognac, which gives the gravy a nutty taste.) Do you have a signature dish?
A. I usually fix the turkey for Thanksgiving, which is held at my mother-in-law's house. Aside from making killer fudge, I am not known for other dishes.
6) What did you give thanks for on Thanksgiving 2015?
A. I am thankful that I have a good husband, a nice home, and good friends. And Saturday 9 and Sunday Stealing and the people who play these memes with me.
7) Monday is Cyber Monday, when shoppers can save big online. Do you shop confidently over the Internet, or do you worry about security breaches and identity theft?
A. I had my credit card numbers stolen online once, and it was scary. I worry a great deal about this and try to sidestep it by having a single credit card I use online and taking advantage of the various alerts my bank offers.
8) This week's featured band, Los Bravos, was international. Their members came from both Germany and Spain. If you could travel to any foreign country in the world, which would you choose?
A. I would love to visit Ireland/England/Scotland. I'd have to take a long trip and do all three.
9) The band's name, Los Bravos, can be translated to mean, "The Brave." Do you consider yourself gutsy?
A. Not so much anymore, but when I was younger I was rather fearless. For example, I went up in a hot air balloon. I took a ride in a twin engine plane with an old drunk guy. I went for a long ride deep into the National Forest to explore a cave full of endangered bats. I went into a burning building (it was a firefighter's training building, and firefighters were with me, but it was still on fire). All of those were to "get the story" when I was an avid and daring news reporter. I don't do things like that anymore.
_____________
I encourage you to visit other participants in Saturday 9 posts and leave a comment. Because there are no rules, it is your choice. Saturday 9 players hate rules. We love memes, however.
Friday, November 27, 2015
A Tale Told by an Idiot
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury
Signifying nothing.— Macbeth (Act 5, Scene 5, lines 21-28)
(Note the reference to Psalm 90.9, addressing the transience of life: "we spend our years as a tale that is told.")
Yesterday the Thanksgiving paper had a series of "I am thankful for" essays by local folks. Two of them, I noted with interest, refuted Shakespeare, declaring that life is good, and it is not, "a tale told by an idiot" in any way.
I tend to be nihilistic in my thinking, so I related to these lines from Macbeth. I think we are miniscule dots in the annals of time, individually and most likely as a species. In the vastness of the universe, what are we, anyway? Do the stars shining in the sky care if we have wine with dinner?
No. Nor do they care if we lie, cheat, steal, live honorably and with perfection, are wealthy, poor, or anything else. In that great gulf between the earth and all that is above, we are what we are, and little more.
So why then, do we persist in attempting to be more? Children of God. The sentient thoughts of the Universe. The last great creation - obviously so flawed that we must create a god in need of blood sacrifices in order to understand our own existence.
Because ultimately we are our own little gods, each of us - are we not? Standing naked before the mirror, the only consciousness in our house - everything else exists in stasis, and time becomes something we cannot see if we are in that particularly moment. But of course we are unable to live in the moment - we have pasts and futures to think of. We think we are alone in this, that other mammals on the planet do not worry about pasts and futures, though I think perhaps the squirrel hiding nuts for winter might argue that its preparedness for the upcoming snows brings with at least the perception of some kind of forethought, however much one might contemplate that it is all "instinct."
Do we not operate by instinct, too, us humans? Do we not mate, fight, argue, and love with instinctive ardor? Is not our entire economic system based upon who can fight their way to the top, who can be the most bestial, the most ornery, the strongest, the most mean? Is that not why we admire the blowhards who care little for those who suffer?
And then - there it is. The problem - or our salvation. Elizabeth Gilbert, in her book The Signature of All Things, labeled it "the Prudence problem" because a character in a fictional book about science and Darwinism was sacrificial. If we are, indeed, instinctive animals, why then do we share our food, feed the homeless, clothe those who need it, and not take our diseased and disfigured children into the wilderness and leave them to die? That is, after all, what the animals do. They discard the runts of the litters.
It is our choice to be humane that makes us human and sets us apart - it is this which makes us godly and sets us apart, makes us more than we are. But it is this choice which I am watching wither away as we become less humane and instead more animal-like. Not because we are worshipping or not worshipping, but because the thing we worship is now a concrete, tiny bauble that we can hold in our hands.
It is greed that has set us back, because now instead of being the insignificant spots we know we are, we think we are more because we have started worshipping this thing we call money. This, our new god, has supplanted all that was and perhaps all that will be, if we don't get a hold of ourselves.
For this reason, we now worship the self-made man, the mongrel who chews and tears his way to the top of the heap, or the well-bred man who has more by mere chance. Not because of our primal instincts - for those instincts can be tamed (the fact that actually makes us humans) - but because we have chosen to give in to those instincts.
Dog-eat-dog worlds beget only misery and madness.
Thus we are where we are, living, indeed, lives that are full of nothingness. I am thankful to be alive - as, I hope, are you, dear reader - but in the end, if our lives do nothing to foster assistance to those around us, are we alive as animals, or alive as humans?
I leave you with that question.
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury
Signifying nothing.— Macbeth (Act 5, Scene 5, lines 21-28)
(Note the reference to Psalm 90.9, addressing the transience of life: "we spend our years as a tale that is told.")
Yesterday the Thanksgiving paper had a series of "I am thankful for" essays by local folks. Two of them, I noted with interest, refuted Shakespeare, declaring that life is good, and it is not, "a tale told by an idiot" in any way.
I tend to be nihilistic in my thinking, so I related to these lines from Macbeth. I think we are miniscule dots in the annals of time, individually and most likely as a species. In the vastness of the universe, what are we, anyway? Do the stars shining in the sky care if we have wine with dinner?
No. Nor do they care if we lie, cheat, steal, live honorably and with perfection, are wealthy, poor, or anything else. In that great gulf between the earth and all that is above, we are what we are, and little more.
So why then, do we persist in attempting to be more? Children of God. The sentient thoughts of the Universe. The last great creation - obviously so flawed that we must create a god in need of blood sacrifices in order to understand our own existence.
Because ultimately we are our own little gods, each of us - are we not? Standing naked before the mirror, the only consciousness in our house - everything else exists in stasis, and time becomes something we cannot see if we are in that particularly moment. But of course we are unable to live in the moment - we have pasts and futures to think of. We think we are alone in this, that other mammals on the planet do not worry about pasts and futures, though I think perhaps the squirrel hiding nuts for winter might argue that its preparedness for the upcoming snows brings with at least the perception of some kind of forethought, however much one might contemplate that it is all "instinct."
Do we not operate by instinct, too, us humans? Do we not mate, fight, argue, and love with instinctive ardor? Is not our entire economic system based upon who can fight their way to the top, who can be the most bestial, the most ornery, the strongest, the most mean? Is that not why we admire the blowhards who care little for those who suffer?
And then - there it is. The problem - or our salvation. Elizabeth Gilbert, in her book The Signature of All Things, labeled it "the Prudence problem" because a character in a fictional book about science and Darwinism was sacrificial. If we are, indeed, instinctive animals, why then do we share our food, feed the homeless, clothe those who need it, and not take our diseased and disfigured children into the wilderness and leave them to die? That is, after all, what the animals do. They discard the runts of the litters.
It is our choice to be humane that makes us human and sets us apart - it is this which makes us godly and sets us apart, makes us more than we are. But it is this choice which I am watching wither away as we become less humane and instead more animal-like. Not because we are worshipping or not worshipping, but because the thing we worship is now a concrete, tiny bauble that we can hold in our hands.
It is greed that has set us back, because now instead of being the insignificant spots we know we are, we think we are more because we have started worshipping this thing we call money. This, our new god, has supplanted all that was and perhaps all that will be, if we don't get a hold of ourselves.
For this reason, we now worship the self-made man, the mongrel who chews and tears his way to the top of the heap, or the well-bred man who has more by mere chance. Not because of our primal instincts - for those instincts can be tamed (the fact that actually makes us humans) - but because we have chosen to give in to those instincts.
Dog-eat-dog worlds beget only misery and madness.
Thus we are where we are, living, indeed, lives that are full of nothingness. I am thankful to be alive - as, I hope, are you, dear reader - but in the end, if our lives do nothing to foster assistance to those around us, are we alive as animals, or alive as humans?
I leave you with that question.
Thursday, November 26, 2015
Thursday Thirteen
It's Thanksgiving here in the U.S.A. It would be natural to do a "things I'm thankful for," but I'm a bit abbynormal, so now I have to think of something else! Hmm. But what?
How about . . . stuff in my office. For which, actually, I am thankful, now that I think of it. Ha. Fooled myself! So Happy Thanksgiving, and thank you for reading! (I love my readers.)
1. A Taylor and a Takamine guitar.
2. A Nikon camera sitting on a tripod, ready for action.
3. Nasal saline spray.
4. The Four Elements, by Don Miguel Ruiz. It's summed up easily: be impeccable with your Word; don't take anything personally, don't make assumptions, and always do your best. The first is the most important.
5. Bits and pieces of a letter to the editor I'm working on about our (idiotic) county's plan to relocate some of the most historic structures in our part of Virginia.
6. My diploma from Hollins College (now Hollins University).
7. A picture of Gandalf the White from the movie The Two Towers.
8. A plate hanging on the wall that says Friends are the family we choose for ourselves.
9. A photo of my nephew, arm back, football in hand, as he makes a throw when he was a quarterback in high school.
10. A hot cup of tea.
11. Two fudge stripe cookies (yes, this is breakfast).
12. A candle shaped like a pyramid.
13. The Chicago Manual of Style (15th edition).
_____________
Thursday Thirteen is played by lots of people; there is a list here if you want to read other Thursday Thirteens and/or play along. I've been playing for a while and this is my 422nd time to do a list of 13 on a Thursday.
How about . . . stuff in my office. For which, actually, I am thankful, now that I think of it. Ha. Fooled myself! So Happy Thanksgiving, and thank you for reading! (I love my readers.)
 |
| Taylor on the left, Takamine on the right. |
2. A Nikon camera sitting on a tripod, ready for action.
3. Nasal saline spray.
4. The Four Elements, by Don Miguel Ruiz. It's summed up easily: be impeccable with your Word; don't take anything personally, don't make assumptions, and always do your best. The first is the most important.
5. Bits and pieces of a letter to the editor I'm working on about our (idiotic) county's plan to relocate some of the most historic structures in our part of Virginia.
6. My diploma from Hollins College (now Hollins University).
7. A picture of Gandalf the White from the movie The Two Towers.
8. A plate hanging on the wall that says Friends are the family we choose for ourselves.
9. A photo of my nephew, arm back, football in hand, as he makes a throw when he was a quarterback in high school.
10. A hot cup of tea.
11. Two fudge stripe cookies (yes, this is breakfast).
12. A candle shaped like a pyramid.
13. The Chicago Manual of Style (15th edition).
_____________
Thursday Thirteen is played by lots of people; there is a list here if you want to read other Thursday Thirteens and/or play along. I've been playing for a while and this is my 422nd time to do a list of 13 on a Thursday.
Wednesday, November 25, 2015
Deer Porn
I have seen deer do just about everything up here on the farm. Give birth, nurse, chase each other, stomp a cat, stamp their feet, huff and snort, eat and drink.
But until this morning, I don't recall seeing them go at it during the rut.
The pictures would have been better if it hadn't been (a) so dark and (b) I wasn't shooting through the window and the screen.
Beware - this is sexy stuff!
But until this morning, I don't recall seeing them go at it during the rut.
The pictures would have been better if it hadn't been (a) so dark and (b) I wasn't shooting through the window and the screen.
Beware - this is sexy stuff!
Tuesday, November 24, 2015
The Found Film
Last week, as I sifted through a drawer, I ran across a roll of undeveloped film. I knew it was old because I haven't used a film camera in many years. I am sure I've stumbled over it before but for some reason, this time I picked it up and took it to CVS to have it developed.
After I looked at the pictures when I picked them up Saturday, I determined the photos were taken around the time of my mother's funeral, which would have been late August, 2000.
I don't think I took them - I know I didn't take all of them, because I am in some of them. I doubt I would have been in the frame of mind to take pictures that day. Somehow I ended up with this film. Maybe someone was using my camera.
Unfortunately, apparently the film had a light leak and most (but not all) of the pictures had a big green streak through them. The film was also old and I suspect that had something to do with the quality. By transferring them to black and white on the computer, I was able to get the pictures to come out a little better. They're still pretty grainy, though.
Based on this experience, any other rolls of film I come across I shall have developed immediately. Time does not seem to be kind to this medium.
After I looked at the pictures when I picked them up Saturday, I determined the photos were taken around the time of my mother's funeral, which would have been late August, 2000.
I don't think I took them - I know I didn't take all of them, because I am in some of them. I doubt I would have been in the frame of mind to take pictures that day. Somehow I ended up with this film. Maybe someone was using my camera.
Unfortunately, apparently the film had a light leak and most (but not all) of the pictures had a big green streak through them. The film was also old and I suspect that had something to do with the quality. By transferring them to black and white on the computer, I was able to get the pictures to come out a little better. They're still pretty grainy, though.
Based on this experience, any other rolls of film I come across I shall have developed immediately. Time does not seem to be kind to this medium.
 |
| My great-aunt, Neva, and my grandmother, Melba. |
 |
| From left: Uncle Butch, Uncle Jerry, Uncle Junior, Aunt Carolyn, Uncle Peanut (Melvin); bottom, Aunt Neva and Grandma. |
 |
| From left: Aunt Neva, Cousin Leann, Cousin Michelle, Me, Michelle's daughter Ashleigh (I think), my grandmother, and Michelle's daughter Kelsey (I think). |
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| Aunt Neva, Aunt Sherry, Uncle Jerry, their daughter Sara, Grandma. |
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| Aunt Neva, Cousin Michelle, Cousin Leanne, Cousin Michelle's husband whose name escapes me at the moment, Aunt Jennifer, Uncle Peanut, Grandma, and Kelsey (I think). |
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| Aunt Neva, Aunt Pam, Uncle Junior, and Grandma. |
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| Uncle Jerry, Uncle Junior, Uncle Peanut, Uncle Butch. |
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| Uncle Butch, Uncle Peanut, Uncle Junior, Uncle Jerry. |
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| Aunt Neva, Me, my husband, and Grandma. |
Monday, November 23, 2015
The Patio Project
A good 15 or 20 years ago, my husband and his cousin put down a deck outside the back of our house. Over the years it turned into an ugly, hideous looking thing that I was so ashamed of that I couldn't find a picture of the rear of the house in the last seven years or so.
I did find some partial photos that will give you an idea of how bad it looked:
It was definitely time to do something about this. So this week the deck went out of here and a building contractor poured us a concrete patio to replace the wood.
All in all, I think this will be a great fix to an ugly mess. The sidewalk is wide enough for a wheelchair, so now we're ready to get even older. I am looking forward to obtaining some nice planters in the spring and maybe a bench or two to place out here.
Job well done!
I did find some partial photos that will give you an idea of how bad it looked:
 |
| The boards were coming up. |
 |
| The stain was coming off. |
 |
| Squirrels were eating the wood! |
It was definitely time to do something about this. So this week the deck went out of here and a building contractor poured us a concrete patio to replace the wood.
 |
| The building contractor cutting rebar (?). |
 |
| The patio formed up. |
 |
| Just because I really like this picture. :-) |
 |
| Ha. Men at work. Ain't that the way they do it? |
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| Cement truck. |
 |
| Pouring cement. |
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| Raking the cement into place. |
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| Forming it up and pouring and stuff. |
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| Looks like playing in the mud, doesn't it? |
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| It was fascinating to watch, really. |
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| Troweling the cement to make it smooth. |
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| More troweling. |
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| Now it is taking shape! |
 |
| Looking even better! |
 |
| Almost done! |
 |
| Ta da! Here it is. Not quite finished but almost. |
 |
| Doesn't that look better? |
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| We have to remove the boards after the cement has hardened. We still need to clean up and replant grass. |
All in all, I think this will be a great fix to an ugly mess. The sidewalk is wide enough for a wheelchair, so now we're ready to get even older. I am looking forward to obtaining some nice planters in the spring and maybe a bench or two to place out here.
Job well done!
Sunday, November 22, 2015
Sunday Stealing: Would You Rather
From Sunday Stealing
Would You Rather Meme
Would you rather . . .
1. be stuck on an island alone or with someone who talks incessantly? Alone. Very alone.
2. be too hot or too cold? Too cold.
3. have a cook or a maid? Maid.
4. be the youngest or the oldest sibling? I'm the oldest; I'll stick with that.
5. get rich through hard work or through winning the lottery? Lottery.
6. have a 10-hour dinner with a headstrong politician from an opposing party, or attend a 10-hour concert for a music group you detest? Concert.
7. be an Olympic gold medalist or a Nobel Peace Prize winner? Nobel Peace Price winner.
8. have a desk job or an outdoor job? Desk job.
9. live at the top of a tall NYC apartment building or at the top of a mountain? Mountain top.
10. have Rambo or The Terminator on your side? Terminator.
11. be proposed to in private or in front of family and friends? Private.
12. have to sew all your clothes or grow your own food? Grow food.
13. hear the good news or the bad news first? Good news.
14. be your own boss or work for someone else? Own boss.
15. have nosy neighbors or noisy neighbors? Nosy neighbors.
16. be on a survival reality show or dating game show? Reality show.
17. too busy or be bored? Too busy.
18. watch the big game at home or live at the stadium? At home.
19. spend the day with your favorite athlete or you favorite movie star? Movie star.
20. live where it is constantly winter or where it is constantly summer? Summer.
__________
I encourage you to visit other participants in Sunday Stealing posts and leave a comment. Cheers to all us thieves who love memes, however we come by them.
Would You Rather Meme
Would you rather . . .
1. be stuck on an island alone or with someone who talks incessantly? Alone. Very alone.
2. be too hot or too cold? Too cold.
3. have a cook or a maid? Maid.
4. be the youngest or the oldest sibling? I'm the oldest; I'll stick with that.
5. get rich through hard work or through winning the lottery? Lottery.
6. have a 10-hour dinner with a headstrong politician from an opposing party, or attend a 10-hour concert for a music group you detest? Concert.
7. be an Olympic gold medalist or a Nobel Peace Prize winner? Nobel Peace Price winner.
8. have a desk job or an outdoor job? Desk job.
9. live at the top of a tall NYC apartment building or at the top of a mountain? Mountain top.
10. have Rambo or The Terminator on your side? Terminator.
11. be proposed to in private or in front of family and friends? Private.
12. have to sew all your clothes or grow your own food? Grow food.
13. hear the good news or the bad news first? Good news.
14. be your own boss or work for someone else? Own boss.
15. have nosy neighbors or noisy neighbors? Nosy neighbors.
16. be on a survival reality show or dating game show? Reality show.
17. too busy or be bored? Too busy.
18. watch the big game at home or live at the stadium? At home.
19. spend the day with your favorite athlete or you favorite movie star? Movie star.
20. live where it is constantly winter or where it is constantly summer? Summer.
__________
I encourage you to visit other participants in Sunday Stealing posts and leave a comment. Cheers to all us thieves who love memes, however we come by them.
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