Wednesday, May 09, 2012

Books: Confessions of a Counterfeit Farm Girl

Confessions of a Counterfeit Farm Girl
By Susan McCorkindale
Copyright 2008
349 pages

I wanted to like this book. I dislike giving bad reviews.

But I hated this book. I could not even finish it. I made it to page 115 and gave up.

I wanted my money back, actually.

There are people, I am sure, who would love this book. This book makes fun of southerners, finds people who are different stupid, and thinks the worst in people is good for a laugh. I know there are people who like that sort of thing.

I am not one of them.

I bought the book because it is a memoir about living on a cattle farm in Virginia. I live on a cattle farm in Virginia, and when I made the purchase back in January, I was finishing up my thesis, which is about living on a farm in Virginia.

You can see why I was interested.

After I bought the book, but before I read it, I checked out the author's website and learned her husband had passed way of pancreatic cancer. My mother died of that, too, so I thought, wow. I really want to read this book now.

I even subscribed to the author's Facebook feed. Which I quickly had to switch to "important only" because so much BS was coming across my newsfeed that I couldn't stand it. That should have warned me, I suppose. (I have since unsubscribed completely.)

In the book, the author uses a lot of foot notes - apparently she has many semi-related thoughts that she doesn't place within the text. The footnotes are annoying.

She used to be a marketing director at for a women's magazine; she lived in New Jersey, she is wealthy. Her husband's family lives in Virginia in a mansion. Money is not an issue.

But in the book she complains about everything. She complains about her job, and gloats (really!) about how she managed to screw over those who worked for her (I was glad I wasn't in that company). The family moves to Virginia, and she has to endure living in the mansion while their house on 500 acres is renovated. She has to endure a bad hairdresser. She can't figure out the dress code for the south. She has to put up with people who ride horses. These damn backwards southerners. Yuck yuck. A laugh a minute.

Not.

And heaven help us, there is no Starbucks close and she is apparently helpless without her latte. I think she mentions on every page that there is no Starbucks within 20 miles of her.

That's about as far as I got. For me not to finish a book says a lot. I usually can wade through the worst of them, but not this one.

What's really sad is there was a sequel to this book.

I won't be buying it.

3 comments:

  1. Ut oh, I hate to say it but that sounds like me! Except for the rich part. I wouldn't know a Manolo if I tripped over them. But I have to admit, I can relate to being shocked by the religious billboards (and the proselytizing), the lack of Starbucks (well, a good New York pizza), and I was also pissed that we couldn't walk around in our own woods because we were taking our lives in our hands because of the hunters. I come from an inner city but I never heard of so many shootings until I moved down to Virginia!

    I tried not to complain too much because I was conscious of the fact that I moved THERE. Also, I met many lovely people and wouldn't want to hurt their feelings. In fact, I've felt torn about writing my truth. Many times I wanted to really let it out. I think that's the best writing. The raw truth. But then I think about Pearl. And Effie. And you. One thing I learned is that there is good and bad in every place. We all know the jokes about Jersey. Was she trying to be funny? I've got Snookie to deal with! And the Sopranos! I'm going to have to get this book. I get all the city girl-moves-to-the-country books. I want to read it to see if I complain like you said she does. I hope not.

    You might be interested in one of the blogs I read called Rurally Screwed. She also moved to Virginia from NYC. Her husband is a cowboy and a soldier. She tells funny stories but I don't think she makes fun of southerners in a bad way. She just published a book about it. I haven't read it yet. Her blog is listed on my list.

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  2. I suppose the fact that this book and its sequel have been published tell us just one thing: getting published is more a matter of who you know than how well you can write. A marketing director at a women's magazine must know all the right people - and how to market.

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  3. Just requested it from my library...thanks!

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