Saturday 9: Hello, Dolly (1964)
Unfamiliar with this week's tune? Hear it here.
1) This song is about a woman returning to the town where she was happiest. How many towns have you lived in?
A. I've lived in two different areas but in eight different houses in my lifetime. I think that's right. Or at least close. I've never lived more than 50 miles from where I was born.
2) Crazy Sam played Ernestina in her high school production of Hello, Dolly! and still remembers one of her lines: "Hey, you with the big ears! What are you doing after the show?" Tell us something that you memorized for school that is still rattling around in your brain.
A. Half a league, half a league, half a league onward! Into the valley of death rode the six hundred. Cannons to the left of them, cannons to the right of them, volleyed and thundered! Into the valley of death rode the six hundred.
There's also this: Gentlemen may cry peace! Peace! But there is no peace. Is life so dear and peace so sweet as to be purchased at the price of chains and slavery? I know not what course others may take, but as for me, give me liberty or give me death.
I'm not sure if either of those are right. But they rattle in my brain.
3) This week's featured artist, Louis Armstrong, got his start entertaining diners on riverboat dinner cruises. Have you ever taken a dinner cruise?
A. I have not. I have had dinner, though.
4) Armstrong took his nickname, "Satchmo," from "Satchel Mouth" -- a slang term for someone with a wide mouth, which Louis believed was his most distinguishing feature. What do you think people notice first about you?
A. Probably my glasses, followed by my girth.
5) In 1936, Louis became the first African American to get featured billing in a Hollywood movie. Have you seen any of this summer's big movies?
A. No. We seldom go to the movies.
6) When "Hello, Dolly" composer Jerry was growing up, he was close to an aunt named Belle who encouraged his love of music. Tell us about one of your aunts or uncles.
A. One of my uncles is one year younger than I am, and he was born on my first birthday.
7) Though famous for composing the scores of Hello, Dolly!, Mame and La Cage Aux Folles, Jerry Herman can't read music. Can you?
A. I can read music a little but not proficiently. I tend to "play by ear," as they call it.
8) Now retired, Mr. Herman lives in Miami. This is Miami's "wet season," which lasts into October. When did it last rain where you are?
A. Thursday.
9) Random question: Have you suffered a sunburn this summer?
A. No. I am a vampire, I do not go out into the sun.
_____________
I encourage you to
visit other participants in Saturday 9 posts and leave a comment. Because there are no rules,
it is your choice. Saturday 9 players hate rules. We love memes,
however.
Saturday, August 22, 2015
Friday, August 21, 2015
Dear Dr. Dumbass
For some time now, I have wanted to write a letter to the doctor who performed surgery on me two years ago and tell him exactly what I think of him and his arrogant, asinine attitude.
I keep thinking I should let it go, that it would serve no purpose, that I might even get sued for libel or something if I wrote it. Because let's face it, the jerk probably would do that, even he even read the letter.
It occurred to me, though, that I could, in fact, make a public declaration to Dr. Dumbass here on my blog. I've never mentioned Dr. Dumbass by name, so it could be any doctor in the world, really. And I fear this probably applies to many doctors, surgeons or not.
So for my own peace of mind, and because it is time, here is my letter.
Dear Dr. Dumbass:
I am sure you do not remember me. I initially met with you on a Thursday in late June two years ago, and after a cursory look at a radiology report and brief thump on my stomach, you agreed that my gallbladder needed to come out.
After hearing that I'd been constantly sick to my stomach for the better part of eight days (and dropped 12 pounds or so in the process), you said you had some time open the following afternoon and could do the surgery then. We raced off to do the prep work required by the hospital, getting the forms and bloodwork and all of that take care of, as you requested.
I told you multiple times that I'd had previous surgeries. You waved off my concerns about adhesions and scar tissue. "Never causes a problem," you said.
So that Friday we placed my life into your hands. I was terrified, and while the nurses were reassuring, you were not. You barely acknowledged my presence when you came in. You should have treated me as a special aunt, a family member, someone you cared about. I am not sure you ever even knew my name. I was just "fat body A" who needed a cut or two, I think.
My husband overheard you tell someone that you needed to get through the surgery quickly because you had a tennis match to get to.
I sincerely hope that whoever you were playing beat the hell out of you during that game. Maybe they threw a tennis racket at you and hit you upside the head.
You did your job. You took out my gallbladder. You forgot to leave orders for post-op pain killers, though, and I lay in agony for several hours before the nursing staff could run down someone who could tell them to administer the big gun drugs. My 23-hour stay at the hospital was like a badly performed circus routine from that point on, so much so that my husband was afraid to leave me for fear something else might go wrong.
None of that was supposedly your fault, though. You don't make mistakes, the nursing staff told me. Ever. Never does Dr. Dumbass make an error. If there were no post-op orders, it was because the hospital computer ate them.
When I saw you for my two-week post-op visit, you didn't remember me. You looked at the incision, cut out a stitch, and told me I was good to go. You never expected to hear from me again. When I questioned why I had severe pain four weeks after surgery, your staff ignored my calls. Finally, after a visit to the ER, I went back to see you about 10 weeks post-op. You walked in and looked at me like you'd never seen me before in your life. I told you about the pain. You barely touched me. "I don't know what this is, but it has nothing to do with the surgery I did," you said. You turned on your heel and walked out, leaving my husband and I to look at one another. You offered no relief, no other course of treatment, no suggestions. You got out of there as quickly as possible because, God forbid, you might have screwed up.
We thought you were a good doctor. The family had some experience with you and the outcome had been good for that person. Your online profile on the health-check websites sucks - you have no bedside manner, you don't follow up, you are careless and uncaring. I read that before the surgery but you'd done OK with the other family member, so we went ahead with you. My primary care doctor had recommended you, as well. And I was very sick and it was, quite simply, an emergency situation, or so I was told. When three different doctors tell you to get the gallbladder out or you're going to die, you kind of have to go with the advice.
Your operative notes were sparse and indicated that you took little time to see if there was any problem. Basically, you yanked out my gallbladder and sewed me up. I knew when I saw where you'd cut me that you had had no consideration for the state of my body, because you'd punctured a place where I already had a massive scar, cutting through that bulky tissue for whatever reason, because, I suppose, that was where you always made an incision and nothing was going to slow you down.
Maybe any doctor doing this surgery would have ultimately ended up disabling me. I will never know. But not every doctor would have dismissed me, nor treated me like I was simply a piece of meat to take a steak knife to. That is the way you treated me. You did not treat me like a human being, certainly not like someone you cared about, and certainly not like a good physician should treat a patient.
You were a jerk. It's been two years and I bet you still are a jerk because you have probably always been a jerk. I try to console myself with the thought that you have done good things for other people in the past. I was just the unlucky one. But I also wonder how many other unlucky ones you've neglected and rejected because you are an asshole. Three? Three hundred? At least a few, because they've left biting remarks about you on those websites I mentioned earlier. Your rankings range from 1 to 3. Nobody gives you a 5. Nobody likes you enough to do that.
It's not so much that you destroyed my life as it is that fact that you don't care, I think, that eats at me. You're supposed to be a healer. You're supposed to care. You're supposed to treat people with compassion and be human about the work that you do.
But you didn't and you weren't.
You were and you are a dumbass.
Sincerely,
A former patient whose husband would hit you in the nose if he saw you.
I keep thinking I should let it go, that it would serve no purpose, that I might even get sued for libel or something if I wrote it. Because let's face it, the jerk probably would do that, even he even read the letter.
It occurred to me, though, that I could, in fact, make a public declaration to Dr. Dumbass here on my blog. I've never mentioned Dr. Dumbass by name, so it could be any doctor in the world, really. And I fear this probably applies to many doctors, surgeons or not.
So for my own peace of mind, and because it is time, here is my letter.
Dear Dr. Dumbass:
I am sure you do not remember me. I initially met with you on a Thursday in late June two years ago, and after a cursory look at a radiology report and brief thump on my stomach, you agreed that my gallbladder needed to come out.
After hearing that I'd been constantly sick to my stomach for the better part of eight days (and dropped 12 pounds or so in the process), you said you had some time open the following afternoon and could do the surgery then. We raced off to do the prep work required by the hospital, getting the forms and bloodwork and all of that take care of, as you requested.
I told you multiple times that I'd had previous surgeries. You waved off my concerns about adhesions and scar tissue. "Never causes a problem," you said.
So that Friday we placed my life into your hands. I was terrified, and while the nurses were reassuring, you were not. You barely acknowledged my presence when you came in. You should have treated me as a special aunt, a family member, someone you cared about. I am not sure you ever even knew my name. I was just "fat body A" who needed a cut or two, I think.
My husband overheard you tell someone that you needed to get through the surgery quickly because you had a tennis match to get to.
I sincerely hope that whoever you were playing beat the hell out of you during that game. Maybe they threw a tennis racket at you and hit you upside the head.
You did your job. You took out my gallbladder. You forgot to leave orders for post-op pain killers, though, and I lay in agony for several hours before the nursing staff could run down someone who could tell them to administer the big gun drugs. My 23-hour stay at the hospital was like a badly performed circus routine from that point on, so much so that my husband was afraid to leave me for fear something else might go wrong.
None of that was supposedly your fault, though. You don't make mistakes, the nursing staff told me. Ever. Never does Dr. Dumbass make an error. If there were no post-op orders, it was because the hospital computer ate them.
When I saw you for my two-week post-op visit, you didn't remember me. You looked at the incision, cut out a stitch, and told me I was good to go. You never expected to hear from me again. When I questioned why I had severe pain four weeks after surgery, your staff ignored my calls. Finally, after a visit to the ER, I went back to see you about 10 weeks post-op. You walked in and looked at me like you'd never seen me before in your life. I told you about the pain. You barely touched me. "I don't know what this is, but it has nothing to do with the surgery I did," you said. You turned on your heel and walked out, leaving my husband and I to look at one another. You offered no relief, no other course of treatment, no suggestions. You got out of there as quickly as possible because, God forbid, you might have screwed up.
We thought you were a good doctor. The family had some experience with you and the outcome had been good for that person. Your online profile on the health-check websites sucks - you have no bedside manner, you don't follow up, you are careless and uncaring. I read that before the surgery but you'd done OK with the other family member, so we went ahead with you. My primary care doctor had recommended you, as well. And I was very sick and it was, quite simply, an emergency situation, or so I was told. When three different doctors tell you to get the gallbladder out or you're going to die, you kind of have to go with the advice.
Your operative notes were sparse and indicated that you took little time to see if there was any problem. Basically, you yanked out my gallbladder and sewed me up. I knew when I saw where you'd cut me that you had had no consideration for the state of my body, because you'd punctured a place where I already had a massive scar, cutting through that bulky tissue for whatever reason, because, I suppose, that was where you always made an incision and nothing was going to slow you down.
Maybe any doctor doing this surgery would have ultimately ended up disabling me. I will never know. But not every doctor would have dismissed me, nor treated me like I was simply a piece of meat to take a steak knife to. That is the way you treated me. You did not treat me like a human being, certainly not like someone you cared about, and certainly not like a good physician should treat a patient.
You were a jerk. It's been two years and I bet you still are a jerk because you have probably always been a jerk. I try to console myself with the thought that you have done good things for other people in the past. I was just the unlucky one. But I also wonder how many other unlucky ones you've neglected and rejected because you are an asshole. Three? Three hundred? At least a few, because they've left biting remarks about you on those websites I mentioned earlier. Your rankings range from 1 to 3. Nobody gives you a 5. Nobody likes you enough to do that.
It's not so much that you destroyed my life as it is that fact that you don't care, I think, that eats at me. You're supposed to be a healer. You're supposed to care. You're supposed to treat people with compassion and be human about the work that you do.
But you didn't and you weren't.
You were and you are a dumbass.
Sincerely,
A former patient whose husband would hit you in the nose if he saw you.
Thursday, August 20, 2015
Thursday Thirteen
We are soon coming up on National Suicide Prevention Week (September 7 - 12) and October has a Mental Illness Awareness Week (October 4 - 10) and National Depression Screening Day (October 8).
Better to advertise these things before the events, because folks who are suffering really don't need days or weeks or months. People with depression and suicidal ideation tend to live with it daily, taking things day by day. Sometimes they take it minute by minute.
Depression and thoughts of suicide or self-harm came come from out of nowhere, or they can have a physical cause. The truth is, mental health is something humans still don't understand, and probably won't for a long time. The brain is a complex organ, and all it takes is a little of the wrong something - and who knows what that something is - and things can get a little whacky.
So what do people who are having a tough time actually need?
1. They need empathy. Maybe you know why your friend hurts, or maybe you don't. It doesn't really matter. Acknowledge that the person feels bad and don't try to find a reason for it. The reasons may never make sense to you. The reasons may not make sense to the person who is miserable. But it is nice to know someone cares.
2. Tell the person that s/he is not alone. Let them know that you will listen without judgment or lecturing. Not just once or twice. Sometimes depressed people repeat themselves, particularly if the issue is ongoing and chronic. Depressed people can sense quickly when they've overstepped a line and frustrated a friend. If that happens, don't be surprised if the depressed person stops telling you things. Listening to someone who is hurting can be difficult and not everyone can do it. Urge your friend to get counseling if the situation seems perpetual or you can't handle it, but make sure that your friend knows you care and are trying to help the best you can. This can be very hard not just on you but also your friend; this is tough ground.
3. Remind the person that s/he is a good person and has value. Many depressed people have lost their sense of self-worth and/or purpose. They're not sure why they are still on the planet and can't figure out why nothing they do is good enough.
4. Ask the person how you can help. Maybe all s/he needs is an ear. Maybe the friend needs a hug. Maybe s/he needs somebody to fix dinner every now and then. But don't move in and take over. Let the person guide you as to what s/he needs.
5. Remind the person of better times. Maybe you shared a fun shopping trip or you had a nice adventure together. Talk about things other than how the person feels for a while. Tell a joke or a funny story.
6. Be there when the person needs you. That might mean making a suggestion - going for a walk or seeing a movie, for example. Anything to get your friend moving and out of the house. Be ready to follow through, because the depressed friend will likely say "no" to whatever you offer. You may need to say, "I'm going to be there at 5 p.m. and we're going to dinner and hit the 7:30 movie. I'm driving." And then show up at the door. This one time isn't going to fix it, but it will let your friend know that you care enough to take action.
7. Tell your friend that it is okay to take things a day at a time. Acknowledge that tomorrow might not be easier - but then again, it might. But let it be okay if it isn't.
8. Try saying, "I'm sorry this has happened to you, but we can and we will get you through it."
9. Tell the person that life is worth living, and that even if s/he feels stuck and can't see a way out, there is always a different choice or option. The person simply hasn't found the right one yet, but hold his or her hand and tell them you will help them find what they need.
10. If your friend has started pulling away, you may need to pull back. If s/he stops calling or doing things with you, speak up. Tell the person you miss him or her and would like to spend time with them.
11. If you are just realizing that your friend isn't well, apologize for not noticing. Please don't make them feel bad for "bringing you down" or something like that. Depression is not a choice, and no one with depression intends to be the party downer.
12. Don't tell the person that other people have it worse. They know that there are children starving, people sleeping in the streets, and folks with poor drinking water. That doesn't make their pain any better. It might make it worse, because it adds to the guilt.
13. Tell your friend that you believe in his or her strength, and that you accept the person the way they are now, not as you hope they will be.
Here are symptoms of depression. If you recognize these in yourself or in a friend, remember that depression is an illness and something that needs to be dealt with, perhaps with a doctor's guidance. It should never be taken lightly.
Feelings of sadness, tearfulness, emptiness or hopelessness
Angry outbursts, irritability or frustration, even over small matters
Loss of interest or pleasure in most or all normal activities, such as sex, hobbies or sports
Sleep disturbances, including insomnia or sleeping too much
Tiredness and lack of energy, so even small tasks take extra effort
Changes in appetite — often reduced appetite and weight loss, but increased cravings for food and weight gain in some people
Anxiety, agitation or restlessness
Slowed thinking, speaking or body movements
Feelings of worthlessness or guilt, fixating on past failures or blaming yourself for things that aren't your responsibility
Trouble thinking, concentrating, making decisions and remembering things
Frequent or recurrent thoughts of death, suicidal thoughts, suicide attempts or suicide
Unexplained physical problems, such as back pain or headaches
For many people with depression, symptoms usually are severe enough to cause noticeable problems in day-to-day activities, such as work, school, social activities or relationships with others. Other people may feel generally miserable or unhappy without really knowing why.
Remember, depression is not a choice. It may occur once in a person's life, or may occur multiple times.
Here are warning signs for suicide:
Talking about killing or harming one’s self
Expressing strong feelings of hopelessness or being trapped
An unusual preoccupation with death or dying
Acting recklessly, as if they have a death wish (e.g. speeding through red lights)
Calling or visiting people to say goodbye
Getting affairs in order (giving away prized possessions, tying up loose ends)
Saying things like “Everyone would be better off without me” or “I want out”
A sudden switch from being extremely depressed to acting calm and happy
Here are causes and risk factors for depression:
Loneliness
Lack of social support
Recent stressful life experiences
Family history of depression
Marital or relationship problems
Financial strain
Early childhood trauma or abuse
Alcohol or drug abuse
Unemployment or underemployment
Health problems or chronic pain
For more information, check out these websites:
Hopeline
Mayo Clinic
Depression Symptoms and Warning Signs
National Institute of Mental Health
If you or someone you know is suicidal and you feel action must be taken immediately, call 911 or visit your nearest emergency room. There is also a toll-free, 24-hour hotline: National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255); TTY: 1-800-799-4TTY (4889), where you may talk to a trained counselor.
____________
Thursday Thirteen is played by lots of people; there is a list here if you want to read other Thursday Thirteens and/or play along. I've been playing for a while and this is my 409th time to do a list of 13 on a Thursday. (I'm not usually so serious.)
Better to advertise these things before the events, because folks who are suffering really don't need days or weeks or months. People with depression and suicidal ideation tend to live with it daily, taking things day by day. Sometimes they take it minute by minute.
Depression and thoughts of suicide or self-harm came come from out of nowhere, or they can have a physical cause. The truth is, mental health is something humans still don't understand, and probably won't for a long time. The brain is a complex organ, and all it takes is a little of the wrong something - and who knows what that something is - and things can get a little whacky.
So what do people who are having a tough time actually need?
1. They need empathy. Maybe you know why your friend hurts, or maybe you don't. It doesn't really matter. Acknowledge that the person feels bad and don't try to find a reason for it. The reasons may never make sense to you. The reasons may not make sense to the person who is miserable. But it is nice to know someone cares.
2. Tell the person that s/he is not alone. Let them know that you will listen without judgment or lecturing. Not just once or twice. Sometimes depressed people repeat themselves, particularly if the issue is ongoing and chronic. Depressed people can sense quickly when they've overstepped a line and frustrated a friend. If that happens, don't be surprised if the depressed person stops telling you things. Listening to someone who is hurting can be difficult and not everyone can do it. Urge your friend to get counseling if the situation seems perpetual or you can't handle it, but make sure that your friend knows you care and are trying to help the best you can. This can be very hard not just on you but also your friend; this is tough ground.
3. Remind the person that s/he is a good person and has value. Many depressed people have lost their sense of self-worth and/or purpose. They're not sure why they are still on the planet and can't figure out why nothing they do is good enough.
______________________________________________
“That's the thing about depression: A human being can survive almost anything, as long as she sees the end in sight. But depression is so insidious, and it compounds daily, that it's impossible to ever see the end.” ― Elizabeth Wurtzel, Prozac Nation
_________________________________________________________________________________
4. Ask the person how you can help. Maybe all s/he needs is an ear. Maybe the friend needs a hug. Maybe s/he needs somebody to fix dinner every now and then. But don't move in and take over. Let the person guide you as to what s/he needs.
5. Remind the person of better times. Maybe you shared a fun shopping trip or you had a nice adventure together. Talk about things other than how the person feels for a while. Tell a joke or a funny story.
6. Be there when the person needs you. That might mean making a suggestion - going for a walk or seeing a movie, for example. Anything to get your friend moving and out of the house. Be ready to follow through, because the depressed friend will likely say "no" to whatever you offer. You may need to say, "I'm going to be there at 5 p.m. and we're going to dinner and hit the 7:30 movie. I'm driving." And then show up at the door. This one time isn't going to fix it, but it will let your friend know that you care enough to take action.
7. Tell your friend that it is okay to take things a day at a time. Acknowledge that tomorrow might not be easier - but then again, it might. But let it be okay if it isn't.
8. Try saying, "I'm sorry this has happened to you, but we can and we will get you through it."
9. Tell the person that life is worth living, and that even if s/he feels stuck and can't see a way out, there is always a different choice or option. The person simply hasn't found the right one yet, but hold his or her hand and tell them you will help them find what they need.
10. If your friend has started pulling away, you may need to pull back. If s/he stops calling or doing things with you, speak up. Tell the person you miss him or her and would like to spend time with them.
__________________________________________
“There is no point treating a depressed person as though she were just feeling sad, saying, 'There now, hang on, you'll get over it.' Sadness is more or less like a head cold- with patience, it passes. Depression is like cancer.” ― Barbara Kingsolver, The Bean Trees
__________________________________________
11. If you are just realizing that your friend isn't well, apologize for not noticing. Please don't make them feel bad for "bringing you down" or something like that. Depression is not a choice, and no one with depression intends to be the party downer.
12. Don't tell the person that other people have it worse. They know that there are children starving, people sleeping in the streets, and folks with poor drinking water. That doesn't make their pain any better. It might make it worse, because it adds to the guilt.
13. Tell your friend that you believe in his or her strength, and that you accept the person the way they are now, not as you hope they will be.
Here are symptoms of depression. If you recognize these in yourself or in a friend, remember that depression is an illness and something that needs to be dealt with, perhaps with a doctor's guidance. It should never be taken lightly.
For many people with depression, symptoms usually are severe enough to cause noticeable problems in day-to-day activities, such as work, school, social activities or relationships with others. Other people may feel generally miserable or unhappy without really knowing why.
Remember, depression is not a choice. It may occur once in a person's life, or may occur multiple times.
Here are warning signs for suicide:
Talking about killing or harming one’s self
Expressing strong feelings of hopelessness or being trapped
An unusual preoccupation with death or dying
Acting recklessly, as if they have a death wish (e.g. speeding through red lights)
Calling or visiting people to say goodbye
Getting affairs in order (giving away prized possessions, tying up loose ends)
Saying things like “Everyone would be better off without me” or “I want out”
A sudden switch from being extremely depressed to acting calm and happy
Here are causes and risk factors for depression:
Loneliness
Lack of social support
Recent stressful life experiences
Family history of depression
Marital or relationship problems
Financial strain
Early childhood trauma or abuse
Alcohol or drug abuse
Unemployment or underemployment
Health problems or chronic pain
For more information, check out these websites:
Hopeline
Mayo Clinic
Depression Symptoms and Warning Signs
National Institute of Mental Health
If you or someone you know is suicidal and you feel action must be taken immediately, call 911 or visit your nearest emergency room. There is also a toll-free, 24-hour hotline: National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255); TTY: 1-800-799-4TTY (4889), where you may talk to a trained counselor.
____________
Thursday Thirteen is played by lots of people; there is a list here if you want to read other Thursday Thirteens and/or play along. I've been playing for a while and this is my 409th time to do a list of 13 on a Thursday. (I'm not usually so serious.)
Wednesday, August 19, 2015
Tuesday, August 18, 2015
My Distant Cousin
My cousin passed away yesterday.
She was something like my 4th cousin once removed (I know the connection but not exactly what it's called.). We shared a set of many-great grandparents here in Botetourt, going back to the early 1800s. The ancestors in common were John and Mary Painter, and then those who came before them.
Pat was my cousin's name. She was 86 when she went on to the next phase of her journey. I did not meet her until I was an adult, about 20 years ago, so she was already an elder when we met. I do not remember exactly how we were introduced, but she immediately embraced me as a long-distance relative. She called me "cousin" every time we saw one another.
She gave me a sense of family for which I never properly thanked her. I always knew, in my heart, if I needed sanctuary for whatever reason, I could go to Pat. Sometimes you just know those things.
Pat was a professor of math at the local community college, a mother of three, a grandmother, a historian. She is survived by a sister, her children and their spouses, many grandchildren, and a multitude of other relatives. She also had many close and dear friends, many of whom live or lived in Fincastle.
Oh, how she loved Fincastle. She always spoke of it with great fondness, as if the little community was the best place on the planet. And with her in it, it probably was.
My cousin graduated from Fincastle High School and went on to attend Hollins College. She obtained her BA and a master's degree. She taught in the local school system for 16 years, and then served as an instructor at Virginia Western Community College for 15 years. She retired in 1992. She was close to retiring when I first met her, I think.
Pat was an active member in local garden clubs and in Historic Fincastle, Inc., an organization that oversees historic interests in her beloved community. She played golf and the piano (though I never heard her play; she mentioned it once).
She was instrumental in having a stone memorial placed on Rt. 779 to commemorate Painter's Chapel, a church that was started by our forefathers, in the Catawba Valley.
I met Pat's daughter before I met her mother. Her daughter was a local writer whom I greatly admired. During a writer's conference, we began talking about our ancestry and discovered then that we were related. We stayed in touch and have remained friends. Later, I met Pat daughter-in-law, who became one of my dearest companions.
I spent time with Pat when I also served in Historic Fincastle. We worked together on various community projects, including the annual festival (now defunct), and in setting up the museum portion of the Early Cabin. I remember how she kept wanting me to come and take pictures of various components of the little museum.
We also were in a book club together for the better part of a decade. I loved her take on the things we read. She always had a spirited point of view and while she sometimes got off topic - well, we always get off topic in our book club. It's a lively group and Pat's presence will be greatly missed.
Three years ago, Pat took my journal-writing class, telling me then that she had kept a journal for most of her life. She didn't need to take my class, but she was supporting me in my efforts to begin a career as an instructor. I hope someone finds her journals and treasures those words.
Pat was a people person - she was definitely not an introvert. She spoke her mind and believed that women deserved the same opportunities as men. She taught math because she loved it. She once told me the only reason girls had trouble with the subject was because no one expected anything else out of them.
I was saddened to learn of her passing, but she had been ill for a while and I am glad that she is no longer suffering. I am sorry, too, for my friend and her family, who have lost a dear loved one.
Life is hard, and getting older does not bring about ease and comfort, not like it should. It is hard to watch those you love move on.
It is harder still to say goodbye.
She was something like my 4th cousin once removed (I know the connection but not exactly what it's called.). We shared a set of many-great grandparents here in Botetourt, going back to the early 1800s. The ancestors in common were John and Mary Painter, and then those who came before them.
Pat was my cousin's name. She was 86 when she went on to the next phase of her journey. I did not meet her until I was an adult, about 20 years ago, so she was already an elder when we met. I do not remember exactly how we were introduced, but she immediately embraced me as a long-distance relative. She called me "cousin" every time we saw one another.
She gave me a sense of family for which I never properly thanked her. I always knew, in my heart, if I needed sanctuary for whatever reason, I could go to Pat. Sometimes you just know those things.
Pat was a professor of math at the local community college, a mother of three, a grandmother, a historian. She is survived by a sister, her children and their spouses, many grandchildren, and a multitude of other relatives. She also had many close and dear friends, many of whom live or lived in Fincastle.
Oh, how she loved Fincastle. She always spoke of it with great fondness, as if the little community was the best place on the planet. And with her in it, it probably was.
My cousin graduated from Fincastle High School and went on to attend Hollins College. She obtained her BA and a master's degree. She taught in the local school system for 16 years, and then served as an instructor at Virginia Western Community College for 15 years. She retired in 1992. She was close to retiring when I first met her, I think.
Pat was an active member in local garden clubs and in Historic Fincastle, Inc., an organization that oversees historic interests in her beloved community. She played golf and the piano (though I never heard her play; she mentioned it once).
She was instrumental in having a stone memorial placed on Rt. 779 to commemorate Painter's Chapel, a church that was started by our forefathers, in the Catawba Valley.
I met Pat's daughter before I met her mother. Her daughter was a local writer whom I greatly admired. During a writer's conference, we began talking about our ancestry and discovered then that we were related. We stayed in touch and have remained friends. Later, I met Pat daughter-in-law, who became one of my dearest companions.
I spent time with Pat when I also served in Historic Fincastle. We worked together on various community projects, including the annual festival (now defunct), and in setting up the museum portion of the Early Cabin. I remember how she kept wanting me to come and take pictures of various components of the little museum.
We also were in a book club together for the better part of a decade. I loved her take on the things we read. She always had a spirited point of view and while she sometimes got off topic - well, we always get off topic in our book club. It's a lively group and Pat's presence will be greatly missed.
Three years ago, Pat took my journal-writing class, telling me then that she had kept a journal for most of her life. She didn't need to take my class, but she was supporting me in my efforts to begin a career as an instructor. I hope someone finds her journals and treasures those words.
Pat was a people person - she was definitely not an introvert. She spoke her mind and believed that women deserved the same opportunities as men. She taught math because she loved it. She once told me the only reason girls had trouble with the subject was because no one expected anything else out of them.
I was saddened to learn of her passing, but she had been ill for a while and I am glad that she is no longer suffering. I am sorry, too, for my friend and her family, who have lost a dear loved one.
Life is hard, and getting older does not bring about ease and comfort, not like it should. It is hard to watch those you love move on.
It is harder still to say goodbye.
 |
| My cousin, Pat. |
Monday, August 17, 2015
Fincastle Frolic
The Town of Fincastle put on a little get-together Friday night. It is an event to showcase the town.
I saw a few faces I knew.
I saw a few faces I knew.
 |
| Balloons decorated the town. |
 |
| My pal Cathy, a fellow writer. |
 |
| Taking a picture of the picture-taker. |
 |
| The county clerk really got into his role as historian. |
 |
| See? He went all out! |
 |
| My friend Pam. |
 |
| Cannon go boom! Not really. It's a decoration outside of the courthouse. |
 |
| My buddy Lee and her fellow. |
 |
| Cathy's daughter, Julia, is on the left. I am afraid I don't know the other young musician. |
 |
| They seemed to be enjoying themselves. |
 |
| Local artist, Ed Bordett, hanging out near the cookies. |
 |
| My husband, right, talks to his old friend, John. |
 |
| The bank was a popular spot; they were giving away cookies and ice water. |
 |
| Old friend John. |
 |
| My pal Rene at the library. |
 |
| My husband has a word with Paige, head librarian at the Fincastle branch. |
Sunday, August 16, 2015
Sunday Stealing: I Want You
From: Sunday Stealing
I Want You to be Free from Me Meme
1. Are your nails painted a dark or light color? My nails are not painted. They are bitten and chewed.
2. Have you ever ordered pizza online? Yes.
3. What color was the last candle you lit? White, and non-scented.
4. Is there something written on your shirt right now? Yes. It says "Keepin' It Rural. Live. Laugh. Farm."
5. Is there a bookshelf in your room? There are four of them, actually.
6. Do you own a treadmill? Yes, and I use it.
7. Have you ever signed up for a gym membership? No.
8. Is there a garbage can in your room? What color is it? White.
9. Have you ever read in the bathtub? Yes.
10. Have you ever had to wear a hairnet? No.
11. Do you know how many pages were in the last book you read? The last print book had 513 pages. The last audio book had 25 discs. The last Kindle book, I don't know because the Kindle doesn't use pages, it uses locations.
12. On what day of the week do you usually do the laundry? I do laundry almost every day. I live on a farm. My husband sometimes changes clothes three times a day.
13. Do you use the Facebook chat often? Define "often." But yes, I use it.
14. Do you have any baby pictures of yourself on your computer?
15. Do you eat onion rings? No. Or at least not very often.
16. What flavor of tea did you last have? Red Rose decaf black tea.
17. Do you own a bathrobe? Yes.
18. Did you/will you have coffee or some other form of caffeine today? I don't drink caffeine.
19. Do you have a mailbox or do you collect your mail from the post office? Mailbox.
20. What was the last animal you saw, and was it a pet? A deer in the front yard. It is not a pet although it seldom runs when it seems me.
21. What was the last documentary you watched focusing on? I don't recall. Does Downton Abby count as a documentary?
22. Is there anything you need to remember to do before the day ends? I need to change the Brita pitcher filter.
23. Is your car messy, or do you like to keep it clean? My husband likes it clean, but I keep it rather messy.
24. Are you the type to wake up before the sun rises? My alarm goes off at 6 a.m. every morning, even on the weekends.
25. Do you get uncomfortable when people stare at you? Wouldn't you?
26. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital for a long period of time? Yes.
__________
I encourage you to visit other participants in Sunday Stealing posts and leave a comment. Cheers to all us thieves who love memes, however we come by them.
I Want You to be Free from Me Meme
1. Are your nails painted a dark or light color? My nails are not painted. They are bitten and chewed.
2. Have you ever ordered pizza online? Yes.
3. What color was the last candle you lit? White, and non-scented.
4. Is there something written on your shirt right now? Yes. It says "Keepin' It Rural. Live. Laugh. Farm."
5. Is there a bookshelf in your room? There are four of them, actually.
6. Do you own a treadmill? Yes, and I use it.
7. Have you ever signed up for a gym membership? No.
8. Is there a garbage can in your room? What color is it? White.
9. Have you ever read in the bathtub? Yes.
10. Have you ever had to wear a hairnet? No.
11. Do you know how many pages were in the last book you read? The last print book had 513 pages. The last audio book had 25 discs. The last Kindle book, I don't know because the Kindle doesn't use pages, it uses locations.
12. On what day of the week do you usually do the laundry? I do laundry almost every day. I live on a farm. My husband sometimes changes clothes three times a day.
13. Do you use the Facebook chat often? Define "often." But yes, I use it.
14. Do you have any baby pictures of yourself on your computer?
 |
| My brother in the car seat, me with the doll. |
15. Do you eat onion rings? No. Or at least not very often.
16. What flavor of tea did you last have? Red Rose decaf black tea.
17. Do you own a bathrobe? Yes.
18. Did you/will you have coffee or some other form of caffeine today? I don't drink caffeine.
19. Do you have a mailbox or do you collect your mail from the post office? Mailbox.
20. What was the last animal you saw, and was it a pet? A deer in the front yard. It is not a pet although it seldom runs when it seems me.
21. What was the last documentary you watched focusing on? I don't recall. Does Downton Abby count as a documentary?
22. Is there anything you need to remember to do before the day ends? I need to change the Brita pitcher filter.
23. Is your car messy, or do you like to keep it clean? My husband likes it clean, but I keep it rather messy.
24. Are you the type to wake up before the sun rises? My alarm goes off at 6 a.m. every morning, even on the weekends.
25. Do you get uncomfortable when people stare at you? Wouldn't you?
26. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital for a long period of time? Yes.
__________
I encourage you to visit other participants in Sunday Stealing posts and leave a comment. Cheers to all us thieves who love memes, however we come by them.
Saturday, August 15, 2015
Saturday 9: Stay With Me
Saturday 9: Stay with Me (2014)
. . . because Kwizgiver recommended it
Unfamiliar with this week's tune? Hear it here.
1) Sam Smith explains that this song is about just not wanting to wake up alone. How about you? Are you comfortable being by yourself?
A. I am an introvert, so I prefer to be alone. I do, however, like to socialize sometimes. I am not a total hermit, though I have been accused of that a time or two.
A. No. I would like to, but the two times I was called I was sent away because I was a newspaper reporter.
3) Smith performed this on The David Letterman Show. Did you watch Dave's final episode last May?
4) Smith says his style was influenced by ladies with "massive voices," including Adele, Amy Winehouse, Chaka Kahn, and Whitney Houston. Of those four, which do you listen to most often?
5) Speaking of style, Mr. Smith is a smart dressed man who looks comfortable and dapper as he walks the red carpet in a tux. Do you enjoy getting dressed up for special occasions?
7) Sam Smith was born on May 19, which makes him a Taurus. When did you last check your horoscope?
A. I read it every day in the local paper.
8) Tauruses are supposed to be reliable, organized and ambitious. Do any of those three adjectives describe you?
A. I'm reliable if I promise something. I am not organized and apparently at the moment my only ambition is to feel well enough to find an ambition.
_____________
I encourage you to visit other participants in Saturday 9 posts and leave a comment. Because there are no rules, it is your choice. Saturday 9 players hate rules. We love memes, however.
. . . because Kwizgiver recommended it
Unfamiliar with this week's tune? Hear it here.
1) Sam Smith explains that this song is about just not wanting to wake up alone. How about you? Are you comfortable being by yourself?
A. I am an introvert, so I prefer to be alone. I do, however, like to socialize sometimes. I am not a total hermit, though I have been accused of that a time or two.
2) Last year a lawsuit filed by Tom Petty and Jeff Lynne, who maintained that "Stay with Me" was really just "I Won't Back Down." Petty and Lynne won. Have you ever served on a jury?
A. No. I would like to, but the two times I was called I was sent away because I was a newspaper reporter.
3) Smith performed this on The David Letterman Show. Did you watch Dave's final episode last May?
A. I did not. I used to watch Dave frequently but that was before I turned 50 and found the bed called me every night at 10 p.m. whether I wanted to be there or not.
4) Smith says his style was influenced by ladies with "massive voices," including Adele, Amy Winehouse, Chaka Kahn, and Whitney Houston. Of those four, which do you listen to most often?
A. Um. None? I only know of one Adele song, no Amy Winehouse songs, Chaka Kahn goes back to my youth to the Disco era, if I'm not mistaken, and Houston hit her prime in the early 1990s, I think. My favorite female singers are Melissa Etheridge and Sheryl Crow, not that anybody cares. I also like Celine Dion (don't hit me for that), early Dolly Parton (though I can't stand to look at her now, with all of that plastic surgery), Bonnie Raitt, Pat Benatar, Chrissie Hynde, and the Wilson sisters (Heart).
5) Speaking of style, Mr. Smith is a smart dressed man who looks comfortable and dapper as he walks the red carpet in a tux. Do you enjoy getting dressed up for special occasions?
A. Not particularly. Having said that, I always try to look clean and neat, and never go out without my hair combed and make-up on.
6) "Occasions" is a word that makes Crazy Sam stumble because she can never remember how to spell it correctly. Are you a good speller?
6) "Occasions" is a word that makes Crazy Sam stumble because she can never remember how to spell it correctly. Are you a good speller?
A. That is what the squiggly little red lines are for in word processing programs now. But I did win the classroom spelling bee in the 5th grade. Yay me.
7) Sam Smith was born on May 19, which makes him a Taurus. When did you last check your horoscope?
A. I read it every day in the local paper.
8) Tauruses are supposed to be reliable, organized and ambitious. Do any of those three adjectives describe you?
A. I'm reliable if I promise something. I am not organized and apparently at the moment my only ambition is to feel well enough to find an ambition.
9) Random question: Look at the floor. Do you see carpet, rug, hard wood or tile?
A. Parquet wood flooring, oak finished. We put it down ourselves about 15 years ago now. It's worn at my desk, where my chair rolls over it even though I have a thick plastic protector there. The protector tends to slide.
I encourage you to visit other participants in Saturday 9 posts and leave a comment. Because there are no rules, it is your choice. Saturday 9 players hate rules. We love memes, however.
Friday, August 14, 2015
Get an Editor
Lately, I have been reading numerous nonfiction "books" that I downloaded for free from Amazon. They are all e-books and I read them on my Kindle.
They normally sell for anywhere from 99 cents to $2.99 or so. They are not true books; most can be read in an hour. They're more like very long novels. I doubt any of them are more than 40 pages (it's hard to tell on the Kindle, which uses location, not page numbers). I would not have paid for them but when they are offered for free, I download them to have something to read at the doctor's office.
With one exception, all of these books have needed editing. They have poorly written sentences, misspellings, and missing words.
The further I read into the work (I have a hard time calling these things "books"), the more errors I found. What seemed like a decent read in the first few pages soon soured.
I understand that these days the reading public devours anything and no one but grammar gussies such as myself care a whit about real sentences and punctuation. However, I would have been offended had I paid money - even 99 cents - for these books only to find so many errors. One or two errors would not be worthy of comment, but numerous ones are.
And the errors are many, and apparently in most of these books.
If you are thinking of self-publishing, by all means, do it, but please at least run the spell check on your software before you hit the "send" button and hustle the thing off to Amazon.
They normally sell for anywhere from 99 cents to $2.99 or so. They are not true books; most can be read in an hour. They're more like very long novels. I doubt any of them are more than 40 pages (it's hard to tell on the Kindle, which uses location, not page numbers). I would not have paid for them but when they are offered for free, I download them to have something to read at the doctor's office.
With one exception, all of these books have needed editing. They have poorly written sentences, misspellings, and missing words.
The further I read into the work (I have a hard time calling these things "books"), the more errors I found. What seemed like a decent read in the first few pages soon soured.
I understand that these days the reading public devours anything and no one but grammar gussies such as myself care a whit about real sentences and punctuation. However, I would have been offended had I paid money - even 99 cents - for these books only to find so many errors. One or two errors would not be worthy of comment, but numerous ones are.
And the errors are many, and apparently in most of these books.
If you are thinking of self-publishing, by all means, do it, but please at least run the spell check on your software before you hit the "send" button and hustle the thing off to Amazon.
Thursday, August 13, 2015
Thursday Thirteen
Today I'm going to talk about guitars. I've been playing the guitar since I was around 12, but I have gone through long spells of not playing at all. Sometimes years. Then I pick it back up and play a while. However, I do not play as well as I once did because I don't practice.
There are many brands and types of guitars. No one likes the same thing, and everyone has a different opinion as to what is best. I think you get what you pay for in a guitar, generally, and so the more money you can put into an instrument, the better the quality of sound as well as ease of play. You can buy guitars from $100 to $10,000 and up.
In my dotage, I prefer a small-bodied acoustic guitar (which seem to be difficult to find in my area). I have back problems and the larger dreadnaught body acoustic guitars are hard for me to handle. Electric guitars, too, no longer interest me because they are too heavy for me to hold.
You can click the links to find out more about the guitar brands if you want.
1. Gibson. I learned to play on a small Gibson (I don't remember what style), and I think highly of Gibsons, particularly with higher end models. Gibson is famous for its Les Paul brand, an electric guitar that most musicians play at one time or another. If I were going to purchase a new guitar, I think I would like the Gibson L-00, a 12-fret red spruce limited edition small-body guitar (priced at $2,799). However, I've not had my hands on one and I won't make such a purchase without playing the instrument first. Gibson has been around since 1902.
2. Yamaha. I have a small bodied Yamaha FG-150 that my grandfather gave to me in 1981. The guitar needs a new set of tuner keys and new strings and it's pretty beat up. Yamaha has been around since the late 1880s, but it has been in the US since about 1960.
3. Takamine. The guitar I play the most these days is a classical Takamine that I purchased myself about 25 years ago. (I can't believe I've had that guitar that long.) It has excellent sound quality and I get a lot out of it for what it is. It is a mid-line guitar, not the best, but not the worst, either. Takamine has been around since 1959.
4. Alvarez. I took my nephew guitar shopping about 8 years ago and he chose an Alvarez to take to college with him. I don't know if he ever really learned to play it or if he even still has it. Alvarez has been around since 1965.
5. Gretsch. My father had a big orange Gretsch electric guitar. It was huge and much too large for me to play. Gretsch has also been around since the 1880s.
6. Taylor. I had never heard of this guitar until I saw a youtube video of a girl playing one. I loved the sound of it. I wouldn't mind having one of these little beauties. They can be incredibly expensive, running in the $9,000 range, although Taylor has a little GS Mini guitar for about $600 that I would like to see up close and personal one of these days.
7. Martin. To be honest, I don't know of anyone who doesn't love a Martin and think it's one of the better guitar brands out there. I would certainly like to have one (apparently I want them all, don't I?). Martins appear to have been around forever, at least from the timeline on the website. It starts in the 1700s!
8. Epiphone. My parents gave me an electric Epiphone in 1977 and I still have it and always will even though I can't hold it anymore to play it. It looks exactly like a Les Paul and frankly it plays better than some Les Paul's I've played. Epiphone has been making instruments since the 1870s.
9. Ovation. Ovation guitars used to be rounded back and plastic, or at least the one I owned was. I traded it on the Takamine because I couldn't hold on to it to play it. Ovation has been around since 1966. I haven't seen a new Ovation in years but from the look of the website, the guitars have changed quite a lot.
10. Fender. The Fender Stratocaster is a famous model of electric guitar, probably second only to the Gibson Les Paul (in my opinion) in terms of playability. Buddy Holly played a Stratocaster.
11. Ibanez. I have never been a fan of Ibanez, but all guitars deserve a second look every now and then. They've been around since 1958.
12. Guild. This is not a guitar brand I'm overly familiar with, but I noticed some of the local dealers are carrying it. They've been around since 1952. The acoustic guitars look nice in the pictures. Next time I'm in a store I will have to play one and see how they sound.
13. Blueridge. This is another brand that I've seen in the local stores. I've played one a time or two and thought they were okay for a lower-end model. I am seeing more and more of them, though. Apparently they are built by a company called Saga, which has been around for about 35 years.
____________
Thursday Thirteen is played by lots of people; there is a list here if you want to read other Thursday Thirteens and/or play along. I've been playing for a while and this is my 408th time to do a list of 13 on a Thursday.
There are many brands and types of guitars. No one likes the same thing, and everyone has a different opinion as to what is best. I think you get what you pay for in a guitar, generally, and so the more money you can put into an instrument, the better the quality of sound as well as ease of play. You can buy guitars from $100 to $10,000 and up.
In my dotage, I prefer a small-bodied acoustic guitar (which seem to be difficult to find in my area). I have back problems and the larger dreadnaught body acoustic guitars are hard for me to handle. Electric guitars, too, no longer interest me because they are too heavy for me to hold.
You can click the links to find out more about the guitar brands if you want.
1. Gibson. I learned to play on a small Gibson (I don't remember what style), and I think highly of Gibsons, particularly with higher end models. Gibson is famous for its Les Paul brand, an electric guitar that most musicians play at one time or another. If I were going to purchase a new guitar, I think I would like the Gibson L-00, a 12-fret red spruce limited edition small-body guitar (priced at $2,799). However, I've not had my hands on one and I won't make such a purchase without playing the instrument first. Gibson has been around since 1902.
2. Yamaha. I have a small bodied Yamaha FG-150 that my grandfather gave to me in 1981. The guitar needs a new set of tuner keys and new strings and it's pretty beat up. Yamaha has been around since the late 1880s, but it has been in the US since about 1960.
3. Takamine. The guitar I play the most these days is a classical Takamine that I purchased myself about 25 years ago. (I can't believe I've had that guitar that long.) It has excellent sound quality and I get a lot out of it for what it is. It is a mid-line guitar, not the best, but not the worst, either. Takamine has been around since 1959.
4. Alvarez. I took my nephew guitar shopping about 8 years ago and he chose an Alvarez to take to college with him. I don't know if he ever really learned to play it or if he even still has it. Alvarez has been around since 1965.
5. Gretsch. My father had a big orange Gretsch electric guitar. It was huge and much too large for me to play. Gretsch has also been around since the 1880s.
6. Taylor. I had never heard of this guitar until I saw a youtube video of a girl playing one. I loved the sound of it. I wouldn't mind having one of these little beauties. They can be incredibly expensive, running in the $9,000 range, although Taylor has a little GS Mini guitar for about $600 that I would like to see up close and personal one of these days.
7. Martin. To be honest, I don't know of anyone who doesn't love a Martin and think it's one of the better guitar brands out there. I would certainly like to have one (apparently I want them all, don't I?). Martins appear to have been around forever, at least from the timeline on the website. It starts in the 1700s!
8. Epiphone. My parents gave me an electric Epiphone in 1977 and I still have it and always will even though I can't hold it anymore to play it. It looks exactly like a Les Paul and frankly it plays better than some Les Paul's I've played. Epiphone has been making instruments since the 1870s.
9. Ovation. Ovation guitars used to be rounded back and plastic, or at least the one I owned was. I traded it on the Takamine because I couldn't hold on to it to play it. Ovation has been around since 1966. I haven't seen a new Ovation in years but from the look of the website, the guitars have changed quite a lot.
10. Fender. The Fender Stratocaster is a famous model of electric guitar, probably second only to the Gibson Les Paul (in my opinion) in terms of playability. Buddy Holly played a Stratocaster.
11. Ibanez. I have never been a fan of Ibanez, but all guitars deserve a second look every now and then. They've been around since 1958.
12. Guild. This is not a guitar brand I'm overly familiar with, but I noticed some of the local dealers are carrying it. They've been around since 1952. The acoustic guitars look nice in the pictures. Next time I'm in a store I will have to play one and see how they sound.
13. Blueridge. This is another brand that I've seen in the local stores. I've played one a time or two and thought they were okay for a lower-end model. I am seeing more and more of them, though. Apparently they are built by a company called Saga, which has been around for about 35 years.
____________
Thursday Thirteen is played by lots of people; there is a list here if you want to read other Thursday Thirteens and/or play along. I've been playing for a while and this is my 408th time to do a list of 13 on a Thursday.
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